2017 Week 14 Review: With Team By Team All Star Tally For Some Reason

mlb-asg-2017

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WE HERE AT THE BLOG LIKE NOTHING MORE THAN TO ADD SOME USELESS SHIT IN WITH THE REVIEWS IN ORDER TO MAKE THEM APPEAR LONGER AND MORE IN-DEPTH THAN THEY PROBABLY ARE. SO WITHOUT FURTHER ADO, HERE IS HOW MANY ALL STARS EACH TEAM IN THE OLE BACKYARD ENDED UP WITH…..

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OH BUT FIRST LET ME NOTE A TRADE WAS MADE:

RCBD traded Willie Calhoun, LAD 2B to JF16
RCBD traded Bud Norris, LAA RP to JF16
JF16 traded Archie Bradley, Ari SP to RCBD
JF16 traded Stephen Gonsalves, Min SP to RCBD

This trade was already well-covered in the chat, I think Odom is angry or something? Calhoun is maybe fat? I’ll do a Calhoun comp since Gonslaves lasted about 2 minutes on the Bad Dudes roster. Willie Calhoun Major League Comparison:  RONNIE BELLIARD for the old timers, Jhonny Peralta for current timers. This was fun.

Okay now onto the All-Stars

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1-  Manchester MooniniteZ (9-2-3)

ALL STARS  (8):   Nolan Arenado, Justin Smoak, Joey Votto, Gary Sanchez, Lance McCullers Jr., Kenley Jansen, Josh Harrison, Alex Wood.

 

2-  River City Bad Dudes (8-5-1) 

ALL STARS  (4):   Bryce Harper, Giancarlo Stanton, Wade Davis, Craig Kimbrel

 

3-  Barnegat Banana Slugs (8-5-1) 

ALL STARS  (8):   Max Scherzer, Ryan Zimmerman, Salvador Perez, Luis Severino, Jonathan Schoop, Jake Lamb, DJ LeMahieu, Ender Inciarte.

 

4-  Point Loma X-Rayz (7-5-2)

ALL STARS  (8):   Jose Ramirez, Dellin Betances, Jason Vargas, Daniel Murphy, Robbie Ray, Yadier Molina, Roberto Osuna, Chris Devenski.

 

5-  Lacey Township BackdoorSliderz (4-7-3)

ALL STARS  (5):  Jose Altuve, Yonder Alonso, Marcel Ozuna, Corey Knebel, Michael Conforto.

 

6-  Astoria Isotopes (6-5-3) 

ALL STARS  (9 NOPE 8):   Charlie Blackmon, Cody Bellinger, Greg Holland, Aaron Judge, Starlin Castro (UPDATE: DROPPED), Dallas Keuchel, Mike Moustakas, Jason Vargas, Brandon Kintzler.

 

7-  OceanGate Trout Fishing Club (7-5-2) 

ALL STARS  (7):   Mike Trout, Mookie Betts, Andrew Miller, Michael Brantley, Buster Posey, Corey Seager, Justin Turner.

 

8- Rojo’s Renegade Force (6-7-1) 

ALL STARS  (6):   George Springer, Corey Kluber, Michael Fulmer, Nelson Cruz, Paul Goldschmidt, Zack Cozart.

 

9-  Toms River Titans (5-9) 

ALL STARS  (7):   Carlos Correa, Francisco Lindor, Miguel Sano, Yu Darvish, Chris Sale, Clayton Kershaw, Stephen Strasburg.

 

10-  Q-Tip City Morning Wood (3-11) 

ALL STARS  (5):   Corey Dickerson, Ervin Santana, Carlos Martinez, Zack Greinke, Justin Upton.

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SO……..I mean there is all your All Stars. KINDA BALANCED. For reference last year the OGTFC and the MooniniteZ were tied with the most selections at 12, followed by the Bulldogs at 11. Two teams (X-Rayz and Cuban Missiles) had only 3 selections. Now that this particular brand of article fluff is out of the way let’s look at what went down in Week 14, as we then look ahead to the FINAL FOUR……weeks. Of the regular season.

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Rojo’s Renegade Force Batter River City Bad Dudes, Build Bridge Toward Back End of Backyard Playoff Bracket  –  11-1-2

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MVP:  Scooter Gennett  –  FUCKING SCOOTER GENNETT making an appearance in the MVP sections. He has 16 HRs this season and is stealing Jose Peraza‘s job. Baseball is magical.  11/29, 7 Rs, 1 2B, 4 HRs, 12 RBIs, 1 SB, .455 OBP     

LVP:  Chris Davis    The Renegade Force CRUSHED the Bad Dudes here and ironically enough I am partly blaming CRUSH Davis himself, because he arrived towards the tail end of the matchup and he did NOT provide the spark needed to uhhh get less crushed. And I mean most of the rest of the team didn’t perform that terribly (a few pitchers but SUCH IS LIFE when trying to get to 24 starts).  1/11, 1 2B, 1 RBI, .167 OBP     

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RRF Hitter Of Note:  Nelson Cruz also had himself a week, allllll hail Nelly Cruz (9/31, 5 Rs, 5 HRs, 12 RBIs, .353 OBP).

RRF Pitcher Of Note:  Michael Fulmer with the EXTREMELY RARE 3 QS 3 W week, but I ask where are the strikeouts Michael (22 IP, 6 ER, 9 Ks, 3 QS, 3 Ws, 2.45 ERA).

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Bad Dudes Hitter Of Note:  Giancarlo Stanton may have gotten knocked out of the first round of the HR derby in his home stadium, but at least he gets a “Bad Dudes Hitter Of Note” shoutout here (12/38, 10 Rs, 3 2Bs, 5 HRs, 10 RBIs, .409 OBP).

Bad Dudes Pitcher Of Note:  Sonny Gray was Sonny Okay last week (I am sorry) so this means that both the Athletics and the Bad Dudes should just trade him immediately (12 IP, 2 ER, 10 Ks, 2 QS, 2 Ws, 1.50 ERA).

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STATEMENT GAME for the Renegade Force, as they raided River City and stomped out the Bad Dudes and declared “HEY we kinda wanna make the playoffs too” in Week 14. And HEY maybe they will, and if they do they just might point to this week as a lil bit of a catalyst just a lil bit. RRF continues to be the cream of the crop when it comes to power numbers in the BCL, which may or may not be a thing, and that was unfortunate news for the Bad Dudes whom put together very strong power numbers themselves in the extended week. NOT STRONG ENOUGH, as they would come to find out. Normally I would maybe spare a sentence or two about how the different categories were won by the Renegade Force but in this case it’s just easier to point out what the Bad Dudes won: Saves, they won Saves because RRF don’t have any closers. Also both teams tied with a strong 4 Triples and both teams failed to record a CG, and that is how you score this massacre. BOTH TEAMS STARTED 24, amicably, so good on them. Rojo’s Renegade Force will look to continue to build momentum towards a ticket to the playoffs when they take on the Q-Tip City Morning Wood, aka the BOTTOM FEEDER OF THE LEAGUE, in Week 15. Nice. For the Bad Dudes they must now head to Barnegat for a PIVOTAL battle between dueling 8-5-1 records, with the #2 Seed and 2nd first round bye on the line. Exciting.

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Next Week aka This Week:  RRF v. Morning Wood (#8 v. #10), Bad Dudes v. Banana Slugs (#3 v. #2 OR #2 v. #3 KINDA JUMBLED, the result of this one should un-jumble) 

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Lacey Township BackdoorSliderz Pummel Toms River Titans, Parade Back Into Playoff Picture  –  11-2-1

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MVP:  Jose Altuve  –  Altuve remains really good on an offense that is absolutely ridiculous right now and yea…….DOCH REALLY LUCKED OUT WITH THIS ONE. Not sure what the rest of the roster looked like at the time but I know it had Altuve and that ain’t bad.  20/36, 12 Rs, 4 2Bs, 3 HRs, 11 RBIs, 3 SBs, .610 OBP     ***MVP OF THE WEEK***  

LVP:  Tyler Chatwood    Does having 3 extra games allow players sucking enough time to corect their numbers so that they are less sucky? I ASK BECAUSE I keep having a tough time assigning an LVP here. So anyways I’ll just give it to Tyler Chatwood in this case, since he got one out and gave up 4 runs. And that out was NOT via strikeout. So not good at all.  0.1 IP, 4 ER, 108.00 OBP         

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BDSliderz Hitter Of Note:  Freddie Freeman returned and PROMPTLY picked up right the fuck where he left off, even played some third base (11/34, 8 Rs, 3 2Bs, 3 HRs, 10 RBIs, .378 OBP).

BDSliderz Pitcher Of Note:  Jacob Degrom, a bright light in yet another not particularly well luminated Mets season (15 IP, 5 ER, 16 Ks, 1 QS, 2 Ws, 3.00 ERA).

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Titans Hitter Of Note:  I for one am happy to see that Anthony Rendon is back, even if I don’t particularly trust him and would probably trade him if I was Head Titan (14/28, 7 Rs, 3 2Bs, 3 HRs, 12 RBIs, 1 SB, .600 OBP).

Titans Pitcher Of Note:  I like how whenever people get the chance they try and annoint someone else the best pitcher in baseball but NO IT IS CLAYTON KERSHAW AND IT WILL ALWAYS BE CLAYTON KERSHAW (16 IP, 2 ER, 24 Ks, 2 QS, 2 Ws, 1 CG, 1.13 ERA).

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And just like that Lacey Township is back in the dance, as a dominant victory over the TR Titans in Week 14 vaults them all the way up to the 5th seed or the 4th seed who can tell it will be clear later. A pretty solid victory here pretty much across the board for the BDSliderz, as a superior OBP and a Clayton Kershaw CG were the only things preventing the TR Titans from getting swept across all cats. Lacey Township would end up starting 18 to the 16 starts used by the TR Titans. but this one was well out of reach for TR so the blog shall not fault them for not pressing for extra hurlers. The BDSliderz ended up TIED for the most Doubles in Week 14 (there was some talk about an “8 day record” that will NOT be acknowledge beyond this parenthesis) and actually pitched to the only sub-3 ERA of the week (2.813), an impressive feat considering the extra starts involved. Oh and they scored the most Runs in the week, with 83. For the Titans this just amounted to a bit of a tough draw, as their offensive numbers were fairly competitive but just not good enough against a really strong performance from those backwoods hicks down in Lacey. ANYWHO, the BackdoorSliderz head into Week 15 having won 2 straight after losing the previous 5 and they have a yuuuuuge matchup with the Point Loma X-Rayz on tap. The Toms River Titans will limp into battle with the OGTFC, and they would need a ton of help to sniff a playoff spot (if it is even possible I suspect it might not be with the way teams play each other yada yada) as they now stand 3 back from the 6th seed with 4 to play. SAD CIRCUMSTANCES as the two-time champs look destined to miss the playoffs for the second season in a row; there’s probably some story arc here about how maybe pitching DOESN’T win championships in the BCL but now is not the time for eulogizing.

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Next Week aka This Week:   BDSliderz v. X-Rayz (#5 v. #4 or #4 v. #5 WHOM KNOWS but this matchup will clear this shit up), Titans v. OGTFC (#9 v. #7)

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Colorado Rockies v Arizona Diamondbacks

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Astoria Isotopes Push Past Q-Tip City Morning Wood, Possibly Positioning Themselves For Playoffs Push  –  7-6-1

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MVP:  Charlie Blackmon  –  CHARLIE out here rocking a JROLL on the extended week and doing big thangs and doing them so well that I was able to just reuse a picture that I used last week or some shit. DO YOUR THANGS CHARLIE.  16/42, 10 Rs, 2 2Bs, 1 3B, 4 HRs, 6 RBIs, 3 SBs, .422 OBP      

LVP:  Mitch Haniger    MITCH out here doing more or less the opposite of what I talked about Charlie doing up there, but to his credit both of his hits were of the extra base variety. ONE WAS EVEN A DONG. Not sure Mitch Haniger arrived the way everyone claimed he was going to arrive but yanno, whatever, still might be time for that to happen…. or whatever.  2/18, 1 R, 1 2B, 1 HR, 1 RBI, .158 OBP     

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Isotopes Hitter Of Note:  Cody Bellinger hit for the cycle on that one day but NO we are going to note Paul Dejong cuz I mean who the fuck is he even (12/28, 5 Rs, 6 2Bs, 3 HRs, 4 RBIs, .448 OBP)?

Isotopes Pitcher Of Note:  Cole Hamels is BACK, I almost forgot he was in baseball for a moment there (15.1 IP, 0 ER, 11 Ks, 2 QS, 1 Ws, 0.00 ERA).

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Morning Wood Hitter Of Note:  Jay Bruce seems to be doing decent, SURELY both the Mets and the Morning Wood should trade him and SURELY they will both fuck that trade up (11/34, 7 Rs, 2 2Bs, 4 HRs, 7 RBIs, .343 OBP).

Morning Wood Pitcher Of Note:  GODDAMMIT Ervin Santana once again threw a complete game, why must he keep doing this he’s not even good WHAT DOES HE WANT (15 IP, 4 ER, 8 Ks, 2 QS, 1 W, 1 CG, 2.40 ERA)?!

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The Astoria Isotopes drew the team that hasn’t won since Week 2 in Week 14 and TO THEIR CREDIT, nearly lost to em. However they did not so this is a less enjoyable write up to write….up. The ‘Topes managed to squeak by here in part due to a few helpful Triples, in part due to their typical HR prowess, and in part due to the impressive ability of the Bonerz to NOT score Runs (Topes won that cat 76-53, second lowest total for the week was 65 out in OceanGate). QTC REALLY GOOD AT NOT SCORING RUNS. The Erectionz actually pitched pretty solidly (11 QS, 1 CG) and Doubled pretty solidly (36) and EVEN got awarded an 8 day tie of the Saves record when they reached 11 (ended up with 12). But yanno, they still haven’t won since Week 2. With the victory the Astoria Isotopes managed to hang onto the #6 Seed, they now continue their tour of the Manchester teams when they take on the #1 Seed in Week 15. With the loss the 2017 version of the Morning Wood remain HOPELESS, but yanno there’s always 2018. And maybe they don’t do terribly at the trade deadline and maybe they win one more before the year closes out. Fantasy, not unlike life, is full of possibilities.

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Next Week aka This Week:  Isotopes v. MooniniteZ (#6 v. #1), Morning Wood v. RRF (#10 v. #8)

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Barnegat Banana Slugs BETRAY BOND OF BROTHERHOOD (that is implied with any gentlemen’s agreement) BY BEATING OceanGate Trout Fishing Club BEHIND BLOATED BATCH OF STARTS  –  7-6-1

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MVP:  Rick Porcello  –   And Jorge saves the day. And ended up dropped for his troubles anyways. But yea without De La Rosa’s 0.1 IP hold on Sunday afternoon coupled with a blown hold from the guy below, without those two events this would have been a loss for the MooniniteZ. Instead it was another dumb tie REJOICE.  3.1 IP, 1 ER, 1 K, 1 Hold, 2.70 ERA        

LVP:  HONOR  –  Honor was not very valuable in this matchup.     ***LVP OF THE WEEK***       

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Banana Slugs Hitter Of Note:  NOT DESERVED

Banana Slugs Pitcher Of Note:  NOT DESERVED

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OGTFC Hitter Of Note:  NOT DESERVED

OGTFC Pitcher Of Note:  NOT DESERVED

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While I DID once again at least bang out MVP/LVP and all that shit for this matchup, I will ALSO once again refuse to really discuss it. Let’s cue up what I wrote the lastttt time the Slugs got all salty in the chat and just make a few slight edits:

The sad part is I want to give the Banana Slugs a bunch of credit here for overcoming injuries time and again this season, but that has been slightly overshadowed by what was by all accounts an embarrassing display in the chat on Friday evening afternoon I think? following a decision made by Slugs management and Slugs management alone to go back on some agreed upon number of starts because they felt they were uhhh tricked into it? Coerced in some way? They just didn’t wanna anymore? WHATEVER the case the issue was never really about a LEAGUE PERMITTED number of starts or whatever, the chat logs clearly showed that (bad) idea was scrapped pretty quickly and everyone is free to start as many as ESPN allows in a given week EVEN IF they agree to a lesser number. I mean I can reach an agreement to only start 6 this week should I choose to. And then I can also choose to start a bunch of extra starters the last day and BETRAY that trust. But I mean that’s probably a bad look and I would have to be understanding of that being a bad look. Is what I think. the news of an Adam Eaton injury. Every team deals with injuries and the # of DL spots has been JUST FINE for many seasons now and until I see evidence of 10 day DL abuse (which could only be seen after a full season and not just after a fucking April) I don’t believe there should be any talk of additional DL spots. Punishment for whining is that I only talk about the whining and not about the matchup and there was whining on both sides here. CONGRATS ON THE VICTORY TO THE BARNEGAT BANANA SLUGS THOUGH.

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Next Week aka This Week:   Banana Slugs v. Bad Dudes (#2 v. #3 or #3 v. #2 FUCK IF I KNOW but this matchup should sort it out), OGTFC v. Titans (#7 v. #9)

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2017 WEEK 14 MATCHUP OF THE WEEK, SPONSORED BY ALLITERATION

 

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MLB: Milwaukee Brewers at Chicago Cubs
Manchester MooniniteZ Pinch Past Point Loma X-Rayz, Presently Poised To Pounce On Preliminary Round Bye  –  7-6-1

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MVP:  Jimmy Nelson  –  Let’s give this one to JIMMAYYYYY for supplying me with a bunch of Ks and some QS and some Ws, sure he needed 3 starts to do it but STILL. Jimmy Nelson has actually been really good since the calendar hit May and isn’t given enough credit for it, SUB 3 ERA every month that wasn’t April. All hail the unlikely breakout of Jimmy Nelson.  18.2 IP, 5 ER, 23 Ks, 2 QS, 2 Ws, 2.41 ERA

LVP:  Cameron Maybin    Maybin came on board for the extended weekend and got himself a cute little angels in the outfield GIF in the chat and everything and he came in and gave NOTHING and took away from OBP, not good Cameron.  0/11, .154 OBP    

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MooniniteZ Hitter Of Note:  Andrew McCutchen was the BIG OLEEEE run scorer in a week where the MooniniteZ only won the Run cat by 1 so uhhh way to go Andrew (15/40, 10 Rs, 4 2Bs, 3 HRs, 4 RBIs, .444 OBP).

MooniniteZ Pitcher Of Note:  Alex Wood is Alex GOOD (so sorry again), but no really Alex Wood has been pretty fucking unreal is what I am trying to tell you people (13 IP, 0 ER, 14 Ks, 2 QS, 2 Ws, 0.00 ERA).

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X-Rayz Hitter Of Note:  Jose Ramirez had himself a JROLL but Daniel Murphy had himself a(n extended) WEEK, well I guess they both had themselves a(n extended) week but Murphy lead the league in RBIs (15/31, 7 Rs, 5 2Bs, 2 HRs, 16 RBIs, .500 OBP).

X-Rayz Pitcher Of Note:  David Price FAILED in his bid to get a week-tying CG on Sunday night but he has been very very good and seems to have recovered nicely from all that ailed him earlier in the season (20 IP, 2 ER, 22 Ks, 3 QS, 2 Ws, 0.90 ERA).

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The MooniniteZ and X-Rayz nearrrrrrrrrly battled to a second tie in Week 14, which would have been the 3rd straight tie for the MooniniteZ, and quite frankly the MooniniteZ were rooting for it. UNFORTUNATELY by the time the Sunday night game rolled around that was only possible with a David Price QS/CG OR a QS and a Whichever Yankees Reliever Save, and then even more unfortunately Price came out dealing so it quickly became apparent the Yankees W probably wasn’t happening. And then most unfortunately Price ended up at 107 pitches through 8 and the Sawks understandably went to Kimbrel in the 9th, and so here we are. A CLOSE BATTLE through and through as 5 cats came down to a differential of and OBP came down to a differential of uhhhh .0045 (notably the MooniniteZ would win Runs 70-69 and OBP .3239-.3194). The X-Rayz would impressively rack up 60 RBIs with only 14 HRs, but ’twas not enough to best the 67 RBIs (22 HRs) from the MM.  Woulda preferred a tie (and then the necessary seeding) that set up some sort of winner takes all in the championship game but BEST-LAID PLANS OF MICE AND MEN and all that….the Manchester MooniniteZ haven’t lost since Week 6 but they snapped a 2 week tie-streak with this one, they’ll head to Astoria to take on THE ONLY ACTIVE OWNER TO HAVE BEATEN THEM in 2017. The Point Loma X-Rayz will seek to halt a two week losing streak in a rather important battle with the new guy they brought into this very league. Exciting.

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Next Week aka This Week:  MooniniteZ v. Isotopes (#1 v. #6)X-Rayz v. BDSliderz (#4 v. #5 or #5 v. #4 but WHATEVER this matchup should sort this out)

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ON TO WEEK 15. PLAYOFF POSITIONING IS GETTING TIGHTTTTTTTT (FOR EVERYONE THAT ISN’T ME….AND LIKE, THE MORNING WOOD…..AND LIKE THE TITANS) AND WE ALSO HAVE A TRADE DEADLINE COMING UP AROUND THE BEND. SO EVERY SINGLE MOVE EACH OF YOU FUCKERS MAKES FROM THIS POINT ON CAN AND WILL BE HEAVILY SCRUTINIZED IN THE CHAT, SOMETIMES. WORK THEM PHONES FOLKS………….

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tenor

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2017 Week 14 Review: With Team By Team All Star Tally For Some Reason

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