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I still kinda hate these segments and question the need for most of these trades to be discussed in even this small amount of detail AND YET at the same time Q-Tip City keeps making bizarre trades, so I keep feeling like I need to type something out just to remind them to stop making bizarre trades. So I guess I will do that oneeeee more time. Hopefully. And then I am going to start brainstorming how to handle the potential flurry of trades to come in a better format than this current format……PLEASE HOLD ALL TRADES UNTIL THEN UNLESS THEY HAVE MY EXPRESSED CONSENT OR ARE DEALS WITH ME.

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THE FIRST TRADE (7/5):

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WOOD traded Brian Dozier, Min 2B to LTBS
WOOD traded Michael Kopech, CWS SP to LTBS
LTBS traded Mark Trumbo, Bal RF to WOOD
LTBS traded Jacob Faria, TB SP to WOOD
LTBS traded Jeff Hoffman, Col SP to WOOD

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THE MORNING WOOD RETURN:

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RF Mark Trumbo – LET’s………just talk about this fuckin’ guy when he reaches his final destination below.

High Minors SP Jacob Faria – 23.9 year righty starter for the Rays, their 9th ranked prospect according to Baseball America (and unranked overall by all of these FOOLS). Has thrown 32 innings in the bigs thus far and they have been BEAUTS:  3-0, 2.23 ERA (2.84 FIP), 35 Ks in 32.1 IP (9.74 K/9), 5 QS to open the big league career. Was striking out 12.89 per 9 with a 3.07 ERA prior to the call up. CLEARLY he’s not like some 20 year old top prospect but has some LEGIT movement on his pitches and his velo has ticked up a bit over the past year, I think he’s far better than projected. Could eventually settle in as a nice #3, could play just fineeee in fantasy particularly if he keeps the Ks up and the walks down (1.39 BB/9, down from 3.38 in AAA). I LIKE HIM A WHOLE LOT.  Major League Comparison: Zack Greinke BOOOOOM went there

SP Jeff Hoffman – 24.45 year old righty and former top Jays prospect SHIPPED over to Colorado in the Tulo deal, and now having to deal with the whole pitching in Colorado thing. 5-1, 4.01 ERA (3.44 FIP), 48 Ks in 49.1 IP (8.76 K/9), 5 QS at press time here in 2017. Pitching farrrrr better than he did in 2016, but still he is a Rockies pitcher and one that currently gets more fly balls than grounders so yanno. BUYER BEWARE and all, if the Morning Wood care about that sorts of thing.

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THE BACKDOORSLIDERZ RETURN:

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2B Brian Dozier  –  30 year old 2B for the Twins and the man that went fucking NUTS last summer. .333 OBP, 17 2Bs, 13 HRs, 37 Rs, 39 RBIs, 10 SBs in 315 ABs thus far this season. Had 14 HRs in the first half last season then went on to double that in the 2nd half, WHICH would be a mighty helpful push for a playoff team or playoff hopeful. Not at all saying that is going to happen though, but what I ammmm saying is any talk that Dozier is washed up or whatever is kinda silly. He won’t have his 2016 but he’s well on pace for sayyyy his 2014, which was a 20-20 season, and 10+-10+ guys aren’t just growing on trees at this point in the year. Top 5ish top 8ish second basemen.

Low Minors SP Michael Kopech  – 21.15 year righty flamethrower for the White Sox, their 5th ranked prospect according to Baseball America (#24 overall BA May update, #11 MLB.com, #25 Baseball Prospectus Midseason top 50 RELEASED TODAY). I wrote about Kopech back when he was traded all the way back in likeeeee February, let’s see what I wrote about him then and then see where he is at now shall we:

“Michael Kopech.  Kopech is fairly well-known for folk tales about a 105 mph fastball, but regardless of the veracity of that claim it can be verified that he absolutely dominated High A last year.  Dominated to the tune of a 40% K rate (14.19 K/9) and a 2.25 ERA.  There are the usual concerns of youthful pitching here, as pitching prospects are always a risk and Kopech did have a 14% walk rate (5.02 BB/9) to go along with the Ks.  But the upside is immense here, hence why he was included in the Chris Sale trade, and it isn’t difficult to imagine Kopech dominating in fantasy as soon as 2018.  A good piece for a Backyard expansion team that might struggle to contend in its first year, and a great trade chip in the event the MWs find themselves in need of a playoff push in 2017.”

OH TO BE YOUNG AND NAIVE AND CONTEMPLATING QTC PLAYOFF RUNS. That playoff pipe dream is now dead, but Kopech is still alive, and he’s been MEH in his first taste of AA:  4-6, 4.02 ERA (3.58 FIP), 101 Ks in 78.1 IP (11.60 K/9). Still throws gas, still walks way too many people (6.09 BB/9). I am sure the White Sox still see him as a starter but IIIIIII, I still see him as a nasty closer. Possibly because it’s easier to predict pitching prospects to fail and end up in the bullpen, possibly because he allegedly has a “violent” delivery and the only guy that can survive that as a starting pitcher seems to be Chris Sale FOR NOW.  So maybe Kopech ends up a hard-throwing closer albeit one that maybe breaks into the Backyard with SP eligibility, which would be a nice little boon for whatever team possesses him at that time.  Major League Comparison:  Trevor Rosenthal.  

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RETURN SEAN LIKES MORE:

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THE TEAM TRADING WITH THE MORNING WOOD BUT OF COURSE! This is yet another instance, that I think can be blamed for a lot of trades, where there just doesn’t seem to be great valuation of the players being traded and NO ATTEMPTS to test the market to see if they can do better than what they are being offered. Perhaps that is the QTC’s problem. Perhaps they are just TOO POLITE and therefore once they engage in trade dialogue with a team they feel a responsibility to get a deal done. IN ANY CASE Dozier was sold below what he was likely worth, I see no reason to throw in Kopech for that return, another suspect trade but at least they are running out of trade pieces? At least that.

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THE SECOND TRADE (7/5):

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XYZ traded Willy Adames, TB SS to WOOD
WOOD traded Mark Trumbo, Bal RF to XYZ

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AND ALSO SOME DUMB DRAFT PICKS. I couldn’t care less about those draft picks so I won’t even look ’em up.

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THE X-RAYZ RETURN:

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RF Mark Trumbo  –  31.5 year old RF for the Orioles, fresh off his best season ever and even then people didn’t really want to give him a job afterwards.  .318 OBP, 15 2Bs, 12 HRs, 50 Rs, 40 RBIs, 1 SB in 329 ABs thus far this season. Hit 42 bombs last season but has notttt really carried over into this season, ISO is lowest it’s ever been and hard contact is way down from last year’s levels. Because I care about the X-Rayz I even went as far as to check the statcast exit velocity shit, and that doesn’t seem toooooo bad so perhaps he can regain the power stroke. Last year had 29 dongs and a .288 average at the break, then hit 19 with a .214 average after. Needs to do a REVERSAL of that kinda year to truly justify the prospect parted with here, IMHO, but also if the X-Rayz win the title all trades are considered good trades for said championship season. Everybody knows that. SO JUST WIN.

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THE MORNING WOOD RETURN:

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Low Minors SS Willy Adames  –  21.8 year old SS prospect for the Rays, their top overall prospect in fact (#7 overall BA May update, #16 MLB.com, #26 Baseball Prospectus Midseason top 50 RELEASED TODAY). In AAA for the first time this season and HOLDING HIS OWN:  .371 OBP, 17 2Bs, 5 3Bs, 6 HRs, 45 Rs, 36 RBIs, 6 SBs in 296 ABs. The only hope for the David Price trade to not be a complete disaster and fortunately there’s a pretty good chance he’s up soon for the Rays (SS situation is a mess) and a pretty good chance he is pretty good. Projects as a future above-average hitter with above-average power and keeps getting called “barrel-chested” whenever I read about him so who knows if he stays at SS. But he shall be good. I think. I feel pretty okay about this one. Major League Comparison:  Addison Russel, BECAUSE ALL SS PROSPECTS ARE LUMPED TOGETHER THESE DAYS.  

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RETURN SEAN LIKES MORE:

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MORNING WOOD IN A SHOCKER! I can’t remember the last time I sided with them but they actually did the RESPONSIBLE rebuilding team thing here and traded an overrated slugger for a potential stud, and even a potential stud that is fairly close to the Show. So props on not grabbing a 17 year old or whatever. Trumbo is not a true 40 HR hitter even in this JUICED BALL era and that’s what I think he would need to be to justify the prospect parted with, I feel there’s probably better or comparable options out there currently in the FA pool, you can give hometown boy Hunter Renfroe a chance for free for pete’s sake. That being said I like the win now moxie outta Point Loma right now.

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And……STILL. I AM NOT GIVING THE MORNING WOOD AN A+ HERE OR ANYTHING, STILL WAS JUST CONFUSING TRADES ALL AROUND. Surely you didn’t need to acquire fucking Mark Trumbo as the one piece you needed to then flip for Adames, so don’t try and sell me on that one. And tossing in Kopech just as a sweetener in order to ensure you got that sweet sweet Jeff Hoffman return in the Dozier deal is just tough to look at. Just tough…….to look at. All the way around. RUN OUT OF TRADE PIECES ALREADY, I dread a potential Greinke or C-Mart giveaway. Is what I dread. Gonna once again implore you to be better than this going forward, Bonerz.