2017 TRADE DEADLINE REVIEW BONANZA: NOW WITH LESS REVIEWS BECAUSE EVERYONE WAS GUN-SHY!

July 31, 2017July 31, 2017 AnActualBearLeave a comment

Yet another trade deadline has passed, and this one seemed far less frenzied then year’s past and maybe that is because of the newfound dynasty system and maybe that is a good thing. And maybe I don’t even know what I am talking about because I was riding around on a jet ski around the time of the deadline and to be honest I am still not sure what all of the trades were as I write this particular sentence. I also don’t think everyone properly heeded my brilliants BUYERS/SELLERS COLUMN from a few weeks ago, and that will be addressed as well. LET’S LOOK AT THE DEALS I’ve yet to address before dochney yells at me, SHALL WE??????? WE SHALL….

THE TRADE (7/27):

#1 (this is Greg, Greg let it go little buddy)traded Carlos Gonzalez, Col RF to RRF
#1 (this is Greg, Greg it is okay) traded Madison Bumgarner, SF SP to RRF
RRF traded Yasiel Puig, LAD RF to #1 (this is Greg, Greg it’s not your fault)
RRF traded Kyle Schwarber, ChC LF to #1 (it’s not your fault)
RRF traded David Phelps, Sea RP to #1 (it’s not your fault)
RRF traded Michael Fulmer, Det SP to #1 (it’s not your fault)

(it’s a little bit your fault)

NOTES/MAJOR LEAGUE COMPS:

CARLOS GONZALEZ, is now terrible and has no business being in any trades…..

MADBUM, back from that freak injury now and still JUST turning 28 and JUST AS GOOD as he’s ever been…..Ks are down slightly, ERA is about where it has always been, getting hit a bit harder than usual but allll in all still a very excellent pitcher and should remain top 5 or top 10 for years to come…..

Yasiel Puig and Kyle Schwarber, two buy-low guys that once had sky-high stocks in the fantasy world, also two guys who have pulled their numbers up to a bit more respectable than I had previously thought, so I am lumping them together here. One’s 26.7 one’s 24.33, one has 19 HRs/11 SBs one has 17 HRs and a .302 OBP (.187 AVG)….both have room to be better both through the rest of this season and into the future, and in fact both have already been much better in the 2nd half of this season vs. the first half…..they remain names to watch in this part…..

David Phelps for the second year in a row a desirable fantasy piece, due to his ability to continue ending up as an SP-eligible Holds guy…..9.88 K/9, 3.53 ERA (3.46 FIP), 19 Holds, 2 Ws in 51 IP this season…..was shipped from the Marlins to the Mariners but he remains in the mix for Holds there…..a WIN NOW or at least MAKE THE PLAYOFFS NOW acquisition as he should lose the SP eligibility in ’18

Michael Fulmer is arguably the best non MadBum talent here, a 24.33 year old righty for the Tigers that I once released after he hit his minors innings limit…..6.43 K/9, 3.35 ERA (3.34 FIP), 10-8, 17 QS, 1 CG in 134.1 IP this year…..as you can see the Ks have disappeared which ain’t great, but he’s still pitching to a 3.3 ERA and it’s backed up by the underlying numbers (only given up 9 HRs for example)…..could be very good for a good while, not MadBum good BUT PRETTY GOOD

ANALYSIS/THE PICKING OF THE SIDES:

The OceanGate Trout Fishing Club were determined not to succumb to their injuries at this deadline (see more below) and you can’t fault them for that. Rojo’s Renegade Force saw an opportunity to add a top 5 fantasy starter who is not quite 28 and you certainly can’t fault them for that either. The OGTFC knew they needed to inject some offense, and with Gregory Polanco and Trea Turner and Jason Kipnis on the DL they certainly have the space to try out some new bats, and it wouldn’t be out of the question for both Puig and Schwarber to bring their stock back up to the point where they could even be traded once again in the offseason if the OGTFC can’t find the room for them. At the same time these weren’t names RRF were terribly attached to, as they are seemingly taking the approach of attempting to ride whatever hot bats are available into the playoffs FUTURE BE DAMNED. With all of that in mind, despite liking the trade a lot for both parties, I will continue to side with the team that acquires the top 5 ace: Rojo’s Renegade Force.

THE TRADE (7/29):

LTBS traded Brian Dozier, Min 2B to #1 (this is Greg, Greg you’re better than this….)
#1 (this is Greg, Greg we get it this things haven’t gone as planned) traded Justin Turner, LAD 3B to LTBS
#1 (this is Greg, Greg when God closes a door he opens a window or something) traded Brendan Rodgers, Col SS to LTBS

NOTES/MAJOR LEAGUE COMPS:

Brian Dozier is a player I have long wanted to acquire but I haven’t acquired him and now the dreaded OGTFC have em, he is 30…..he was also like JUST traded so I am gonna steal that writing:

“30 year old 2B for the Twins and the man that went fucking NUTS last summer. .333 OBP, 17 2Bs, 13 HRs, 37 Rs, 39 RBIs, 10 SBs in 315 ABs thus far this season. Had 14 HRs in the first half last season then went on to double that in the 2nd half, WHICH would be a mighty helpful push for a playoff team or playoff hopeful. Not at all saying that is going to happen though, but what I ammmm saying is any talk that Dozier is washed up or whatever is kinda silly. He won’t have his 2016 but he’s well on pace for sayyyy his 2014, which was a 20-20 season, and 10+-10+ guys aren’t just growing on trees at this point in the year. Top 5ish top 8ish second basemen.”

Justin Turner is a guy I released and kinda wish I didn’t given the way the roster has fluctuated since then and yes I am making all of these all about me…..FUCKING .455 OBP, 19 2Bs, 11 HRs, 45 Rs, 41 RBIs, 2 SBs in 278 ABs…..he’s lost some time to injury and the power has been a bit depleted from a HR perspective, but Doubles are there and MAH GAWD that OBP…..that OBP plays in an OBP league, it’s a weeee bit of a mirage (.374 BABIP) but two years ago he ran a .404 BABIP across a similar numbers of ABs so MEH he could keep that number elevated…..the man hits a lot of liners and liners are good for BABIP…..don’t really have much else to say here, I heart Justin Turner and I think you should too…..

Brendan Rodgers, soon to be 21 and the Rox top prospect according to I assume everyone (#7 overall BA, #6 BP, #9 MLB.com)…...324 OBP, 5 HRs in 124 AA ABs following a .419 OBP (.400 AVG), 12 HRs in 210 A+ ABs…..so MOVING RIGHT ALONG, coming soon to take Trevor Story‘s job…..how soon that will be I am not entirely sure, but the point is everyone thinks the guy will hit at the MLB level and I’ve seen the tools considered to be similar to Gleyber Torres…..will also have the Coors advantage…..Major League Comparison: A MUCH BETTER TREVOR STORY. I am so mean to Trevor Story. No for real though I am unfortunately going with the other former Rox SS, Troy Tulowitzki….the Rox will hope a more durable version.

ANALYSIS/THE PICKING OF THE SIDES:

I LIKE THIS ONE A LOT for both sides yet again, which is unfortunate cuz I still have to pick one. And so I think I have to pick Lacey Township BackdoorSliderz, here’s why gang: Basically cuzzzzz Rodgers has a chance to be really really good in the future and Turner has been almost as valuable as Dozier this particular season, albeit at slightly different positions. Turner was a super late bloomer so he’s really only been worth something the past like 3 seasons, and he is already just about 33, but for a team like Lacey with Altuve (and to a lesser extent Villar) already entrenched at the primary middle infield spots Dozier almost becomes a bit of a luxury. I don’t blame the OGTFC for wanting to acquire him, and it could very well pay off for them in the short term…..particularly if he’s about to embark on an August similar to last season’s August. But Rodgers might hurt down the line and Justin Turner might be as valuable or more valuable than Dozier for the rest of this season and for those reasons, I side with the souther NJ franchise.

THE TRADE (7/29):

WOOD traded Justin Verlander, Det SP to #1 (this is Greg, really Greg?)
#1 (this is Greg, Greg strong men also cry) traded Ian Happ, ChC LF to WOOD

NOTES/MAJOR LEAGUE COMPS:

Justin Verlander is a guy I OUTRIGHT RELEASED, 34.5 years old and having an up and down season…..6-7, 4.29 ERA (4.14 FIP), 126 Ks in 130 IP (8.72 K/9), 13 QS…..Admittedly he has been pitching MUCH BETTER since pretty much the moment I dropped him, 4 QS in his last 5 starts and 34 Ks in 32 IP…..so once again he has positioned himself as a deadline piece for a playoff hopeful to acquire and once again one acquired him…..

Ian Happ is a just-about 23 year old 2B/OF for the Cubs enjoying his first taste of the big leagues, he’s been up since mid-May….. .320 OBP, 12 2Bs, 2 3Bs, 13 HRs, 31 Rs, 34 RBIs, 5 SBs in 223 ABs…..he was likeee the Cubs 2nd best prospect heading into the season, #63 overall according to Baseball America, I dunno what that makes him now JUST A GUY I think…..but a guy that has shown a bit of pop in his rookie season, and some versatility, and those things can play well in fantasy…..since he just broke into the bigs this season eels like I should throw in a comp and it’s going to be the super obvious one….Major League Comparison: Ben Zobrist.

ANALYSIS/THE PICKING OF THE SIDES:

I like the Q-Tip City Morning Wood side of this one best. Let us get that out of the way early. Verlander was the quintessential “guy that should be moved from last place team at the deadline” and getting Ian Happ is a NOT TOO SHABBY at all return, the real Cubs would probably balk at such a price. And for the OGTFC they grabbed Verlander cuz I dunno, they are grasping at straws and finally got tired of Dylan Bundy and yada yada yada. So the QTCMW are the side I side with here. BUT, this doesn’t excuse the relative lack of selling that took place in Q-Tip City at this year’s deadline almost in PETTY DEFIANCE of my article. It just so happens that I know a few of the offers that came in for Zack Greinke, I am not going to go so far as to name the other names but REST ASSURED I AM DISGUSTED that he is still in Q-Tip City. He may look 22 but he is in fact old and plays his home games in a hitter’s park and you should have traded that man before the wheels fell off a la ohhh I dunno like the 2nd half of 2016. When he is dropped next season in early June I will name the names. I think he should have been moved. I also think a guy like Felix Hernandez should have been moved if anything of future value could be acquired for him, ditto really ANY reliever that you could get some upgrades for because that is a team in need of many many upgrades. But what do I know. GOOD JOB ON THE VERLANDER THING THOUGH.

So let this serve as my official Trade Deadline Review, and I gotta tell ya earlier in the season I was terribly worried that there would be 20 deals and my fingers would hurt from writing about them given the verbose Trade Reviews I had been occasionally cranking out. And mercifully, I guess, this trade deadline was a big disappointment and this wasn’t too intensive. THE FUTURE OF THE BLOG may still end up with some sort of monthly trade reviews only type situation, whom knows, but I just want to take this opportunity to say it has been a pleasure getting to critique everyone’s every move in a public forum even while making my own easy-to-critique moves. In the end the league mantra is that everyone should just “manage their own damn team” and I hope all that I have critiqued know that it is all in good fun, truthfully I could give a shit what you do with your rosters. I could also give a shit if you give a shit about me talking shit about what you do with your rosters. ALL IN GOOD FUN. SEE YOU WHEN TRADES OPEN UP FOLLOWING THE CONCLUSION OF THE PLAYOFFS MAYBE OR SOMETHING WHO KNOWS HOW THAT WORKS EXACTLY WE ARE FEELING OUR WAY THROUGH THIS DYNASTY THING.

TRADE REVIEW: SECOND PIN TO DROP OF THE TRADE DEADLINE? EDITION? ALSO SECOND WISHING OF HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO COMMISH ODOM EDITION

July 27, 2017July 27, 2017 AnActualBearLeave a comment

AGAIN JUST CANNOT WISH ENOUGH OF THE BIRTHDAY WISHES TO OUR FUHRER OUR EMPEROR OUR SUPREME DIGNITY OUR COMMISSIONER A ONE MIKE ODOM. LONG MAY HE LIVE LONG MAY HE REIGN. FOR A BIRTHDAY PRESENT I WILL NOW REVIEW A TRADE IN WHICH I UNDOUBTEDLY SHOULD HAVE SHOPPED MORE AND ADDED A PROSPECT JUST FOR THE SAKE OF APPEASING THE MASSES. LET’S LOOK….

THE TRADE (7/27):

MOON dropped Jose Reyes, NYM 3B to Waivers
WOOD traded Felipe Rivero, Pit RP to MOON
MOON traded Alex Reyes*, StL SP to WOOD

NOTES/MAJOR LEAGUE COMPS:

Felipe Rivero aka the best closer nobody gives a shit about, 26 years old aka IN HIS PRIME…..10.25 K/9, 0.68 ERA, 14 Holds, 9 Saves, 4 Ws in 52.2 IP this season…..I’m into him more for the other stuff, set the min. innings to 50 and he has the lowest WHIP in baseball (0.70)…..now is where I point out that is OBVIOUSLY CHERRYPICKING, most relievers have slightly less than 50 IP this season….so set it to 40 and he’s just like 9th in FIP (2.28), 9th in Swinging Strike % (16.1%)…..point is I see a whole lot of Andrew Miller in him and I don’t think those goddamned OGTFC were going to part with Miller for Reyes so here we are…..

The prize of the trade is, IF POLLING IS TO BE TRUSTED, soon to be 23 year old Alex Reyes…..recovering from TJ but seems to be recovering nicely…..1.57 ERA (2.67 FIP), 10.17 K/9 across 46 IP in 2016…..still the Cards top prospect, still rated very highly on prospect lists but I don’t want to look up exact numbers for fear of getting sad about it…..should be prettttty damned good so long as the arm returns healthy (which might require some mechanical changes SEE HORRIFYING TOMMY JOHN TWIST THING BELOW), even if the fastball loses a few ticks…..probably will be on an innings limit if he makes it back at all in 2018, ergo likely wouldn’t be pitching deep into games ergo likely will be kinda useless until 2019 at the earliest….Major League Comparison: Noah Syndergaard. Remind me to try and trade for Noah Syndergaard this offseason.

Sean’s half-assed attempt at trade justification: http://www.chrisoleary.com/pitching/PIP/Overviews/Reyes_Alex_PitchingMechanics.html

ANALYSIS/THE PICKING OF THE SIDES:

So WHY? WHY DO YOU DO THIS SEAN? You do this because you really like Felipe Rivero SO MUCH SO that you don’t care about haggling over additional pieces, and you do it because you don’t necessarily expect Reyes to contribute in 2018 and you can’t see that far ahead of things to wait on a possible trade window. You also do it because you were tired of waiting on another trade to go through. And if you are the Morning Wood, you accept this trade nigh IMMEDIATELY because you’re smarter than some of your previous transactions might seem to indicate. There will be another Rivero to come from nowhere next year, and really losing teams in fantasy should take a cue from losing teams in the majors and part with most of their relievers whenever possible (assuming those relievers aren’t like Jansen Kimbrel Chapman Miller etc. etc. etc. ONLY THE CREAM OF THE CROP. So the QTCMW did the right thing here, get themselves a potential future ace at a TJ discount. Even if the MooniniteZ had serious reservations about the future of Mr. Reyes it isn’t like they achieved some sort of massive haul with that in mind, they went with a quick WIN NOW reliever pickup and called it a day. Ergo I side with the Morning Wood here, with the caveat that if I win the championship this season it doesn’t fucking matter if Reyes is the next Noah Syndergaard or some shit.

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ALSO REVIEWED.

TRADE REVIEW: FIRST PIN TO DROP OF THE TRADE DEADLINE? EDITION? ALSO HAPPY BIRTHDAY COMMISH ODOM EDITION

July 27, 2017July 27, 2017 AnActualBearLeave a comment

This post was mostly done because I want to extend the warmest of birthday wishes to OUR FUHRER OUR EMPEROR OUR SUPREME DIGNITY OUR COMMISSIONER A ONE MIKE ODOM. LONG MAY HE LIVE LONG MAY HE REIGN.

THE TRADE (7/26):

rmac traded Josh Bell, Pit 1B to JF16
rmac traded Clint Frazier, NYY CF to JF16
JF16 traded Buster Posey, SF C to rmac
JF16 dropped Tommy Kahnle, NYY RP to Waivers

NOTES/MAJOR LEAGUE COMPS WHEN APPLICABLE CUZ I STILL ENJOY THOSE:

Josh Bell is just about 25 and in his first full season and has already mashed 18 HRs, so finally showing some glimpses of the power that should accompany his decent size (6-2, 245 lbs)…..doesn’t strike out a ton which is good (19.5% K rate)…..hits the ball on the ground too much which is bad (52.7% GB rate)…..could be a 25 HR a year guy, could post decent OBPs if he keeps his discipline, could just be another first basemen in an endless sea of first basemen…..

Clint Frazier is a 22.9 year old OF for the Yanks and a good bet to be sent down when Aaron Hicks returns so this must be a 2018 move I S’POSE…..’twas Baseball America’s 49th ranked prospect in their most recent update (Baseball Prospectus UR in their top recent top 50, MLB.com 27th)…..has had a decent showing in his time in the majors, particularly from a fantasy league that values XBH perspective (6 2Bs, 2 3Bs, 3 HRs in 69 ABs)…..has had terrible plate discipline howevs (2.9% BB Rate, 27.8% K Rate) but THAT HAPPENS, Frazier can probably develop into a solid OF in fantasy particularly if the batter’s eye improves a bit…..should end up in a corner OF spot where the bar is a little higher but STILL, I think I have done a comp before let’s pull up that comp…..Major League Comparison: “Andrew McCutchen because I don’t see color, which version of Cutch it remains to be seen.” YEESH, McCutchen was really really good for a good while so that is a bold one. But yanno MAYBE. Or maybe he’s 2016 McCutchen, who was still pretty solid.

But A ONE BUSTER POSEY is the only current fantasy star here…..30.33 years old and having one of his finest seasons eva after having one of his least finest seasons eva in 2016, his current .413 OBP would be the highest mark of his career…..currently the 2nd ranked catcher in ESPN’s strange system, JT Realmuto is the top-ranked catcher and the Titans have him too…..

ANALYSIS/THE PICKING OF THE SIDES:

So WHY? WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO BUSTER? If you’re the OGTFC. Well you do it to try and get younger in some spots, you do it because you are frustrated with your team’s 2017 performance, and most of all you do it because you believe that Francisco Mejia will hit the bigs in the eventual future and you want to clear the spot for him. Fair enough. and WHY? WHY DO YOU DO THIS IF YOU ARE THE TITANS? That is easy, you do it because it is Buster Posey and you have up nothing really of consequence to acquire him. Ergo I side with the Titans here, but yanno manage your own damn teams and whatnot.

THERE. REVIEWED.

2017 Week 15 Review: ATTACK OF THE AL EDITION (not that I want to encourage naming the leagues AL and NL, I encourage renaming them every goddamned year)

July 24, 2017 AnActualBearLeave a comment

Week 15 saw the AL SWEEEEEEEP the matchups, which is unfortunate. It also saw the league get all bunched the fuck up, as the 3-5 seeds all currently share the same record and ditto for the 6th and 7th seeds. So we are currently relying on our zaneeeeeey tiebreakers to sort out that mess, like I told you people earlier division matchups should have mattered to you more at the time. And now here we are with your division records being what they are. Go back and pull up the Week 13 review if you wanna see ’em. While you are doing that I will review this stupid goddamned Week 15…..

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Rojo’s Renegade Force Roll Over Q-Tip City Morning Wood, As Many Have Before Them As Some Probably Will After Them – 11-2-1

MVP: Adam Jones – Adam Jones HOLY SHIT YOU ARE STILL PLAYING?! Adam Jones is still playing and he had himself a very solid week. Let us use this moment to check in on his numbers against lefties this year. Adam Jones is slashing .242/.306/.394 against lefties this season, not great but MUCH BETTER than last year. Way to go Adam. 13/31, 11 Rs, 2 2Bs, 3 HRs, 10 RBIs, .455 OBP ***MVP OF THE WEEK***

LVP: Jeff Hoffman – I dunno who is ever to blame here? We can just blame Jeff Hoffman and move on, I mean THIS WAS A GUY that was a return in the Brian Dozier trade and here he is just dropped now following his Week 15 start. It is almost like that wasn’t a good trade or something. 3 IP, 7 ER, 2 Ks, 21.00 ERA

RRF Hitter Of Note: Chris Taylor JROLL, who the fuck even isssss this guy AMIRITE (13/24, 6 Rs, 3 2Bs, 1 3B, 2 HRs, 5 RBIs, 1 SB, .542 OBP)?!

RRF Pitcher Of Note: Just need to keep pointing out that Corey Kluber is fucking onnnnnn one and has been for the past like 2 months at least (7.2 IP, 1 ER, 14 Ks, 1 QS, 1 W, 1.17 ERA).

Morning Wood Hitter Of Note: Whit Merrifield had a damn fine Week 15 and is having a damn fine season and that is kinda weird as well AMIRITE (9/23, 5 Rs, 2 2Bs, 3 HRs, 7 RBIs, 1 SB, .483 OBP)?!

Morning Wood Pitcher Of Note: Felipe Rivero had 3 Saves last week but mostly I just want to shout him out cuz as of writing this he’s sitting on a 0.70 ERA and 0.70 WHIP and that is both impressive and interesting AMIRITE (3.1 IP, 0 ER, 4 Ks, 3 Saves, 0.00 ERA)?!

ASSORTED MUSINGS/ANALYSIS: Just HOW did this result occur you ask? Glad you asked. GOOD ENOUGH numbers for RRF defeated piss poor numbers for QTC. That is how. The Bonerz put up the worst totals for the week in Runs, HRs, RBIs, and Strikeouts and uhhhh the Renegade Force did better than them in other stuff too. The Bonerz did put up an impressive 7 Saves from their trio of solid savers but yanno, this is also the matchup where 7 Saves is pretty much 5 or 6 Saves too many. A MORE COMPETITIVE FRANCHISE might have not even had enough closers active in the week to amass such a Saves total. What I am saying is that I am playing the Renegade Force this week and I will use less than 3 closers probably the whole time. Is what I am saying. After two straight 11 category victories (and a record of 3-0-1 in their last 4) Rojo’s Renegade Force find themselves in the playoffs as the #6, they now head to Manchester to take on the top-seeded MooniniteZ. As for the Q-Tip City Morning Wood, they still haven’t won since starting out 2-0. KINDA IMPRESSIVE AT THIS POINT. I do not foresee another victory for them and they are in need of wholesale changes if they want to win a 3rd game next season.

Next Week aka This Week: RRF v. MooniniteZ (#6 or #7 v. #1), Morning Wood v. Banana Slugs (#10 v. #2)

Toms River Titans Take It To OceanGate Trout Fishing Club – 10-3-1

MVP: Michael Wacha – Whoaaaaa Michael Wacha has been good, which might help to keep the Titans pitching stats all nice and pretty as they endure ace injury after ace injury ~~after ace injury~~ no just two ace injuries at the moment. OH but also Syndergaard and Pineda but I don’t want to declare Pineda an ace so just the two fresh ace injuries and then Noah. We can all barely remember when the Titans traded for Noah. But ANYWAYS yea Wacha was good in one of his 2 starts last week. 15 IP, 5 ER, 14 Ks, 1 QS, 1 W, 1 CG, 3.00 ERA

LVP: Ian Happ – Rookies gonna rookie sometimes. 4/18, 1 2B, 1 RBI, .222 OBP

Titans Hitter Of Note: Miguel Sano has been good everyone take note he is officially good now (7/24, 5 Rs, 1 2B, 2 HRs, 6 RBIs, .333 OBP).

Titans Pitcher Of Note: UPDATE to the aces injured stuff, Stephen Strasburg is probably fine and he had one great start last week and might have had another if not for a pesky stiff forearm (9 IP, 1 ER, 13 Ks, 1 QS, 1 W, 1.00 ERA).

OGTFC Hitter Of Note: I dunno Mike Trout was okay but by Trout standards he sucked so it was just THAT KINDA WEEK out there in the OG (4/17, 5 Rs, 3 HRs, 6 RBIs, 1 SB, .381 OBP).

OGTFC Pitcher Of Note: Tanner Roark finally put together a nice start for a goddamned change (7 IP, 2 ER, 11 Ks, 1 QS, 1 W, 2.57 ERA).

ASSORTED MUSINGS/ANALYSIS: And this sad championship defense saddddddly rolls on, as the OGTFC suffer a very bad loss at a very bad point in the season to the 9th ranked Titans. This one knocked the OGTFC out of the playoffs, for the time being, and also deprived us all of getting to see an ugly yet symmetrical 5-5-5 record. Not much went well for the Trout Fishing Club, as they swatted their way to a tied-for-worst-in-Week-15 8 HRs and scored a would-have-been-worst-if-not-for-Bonerz 35 Runs. The Titans did better in these categories and also pitched to a pretty 2.403 ERA, which helped them grab a 5-2 advantage on the pitching side of things. For the Titans the playoffs may be a longshot, in fact they may be mathematically impossible given all of the different matchups and yada yada, but they can at least play spoiler for a bit. They will look to do just that in Week 16. AND FOR THE FISHING CLUB, they will continue to try and be the first team in I dunno a while to win the title and then fail to make the playoffs the following season. And now that I look it up it has never happened. So there you go. THE OGTFC CHASING HISTORY.

Next Week aka This Week: Titans v. Bad Dudes (#9 v. #5 or #4 or #3), OGTFC v. X-Rayz (#8 v. #3 or #4)

Astoria Isotopes HALT THE NON-LOSING STREAK OF THE Manchester MooniniteZ SAD! – 9-4-1

MVP: Charlie Blackmon – Fucking Charlie Blackmon killing it for THE THIRD WEEK IN THE ROW, goddamn this guy. He’s good though and I am a fan but also fuck him for this one. 12/22, 12 Rs, 1 2Bs, 2 3Bs, 3 HRs, 5 RBIs, .571 OBP

LVP: Chris Owings – Chris Owings YOU GAVE ME NOTHING. Thanks for pretty much nothing, Chris Owings. 2/22, 1 R, 1 2B, .091 OBP

Isotopes Hitter Of Note: Mark Reynolds also did a number on me, fucking Rockies homestands for ya (6/22, 5 Rs, 1 2B, 3 HRs, 8 RBIs, .333 OBP).

Isotopes Pitcher Of Note: How about German Marquez giving the ‘Topes two excellent Coors starts with 9Ks a piece, IMPRESSIVE WORK for German and he gets dropped for his troubles (13.2 IP, 5 ER, 18 Ks, 2 QS, 2 Ws, 3.29 ERA).

MooniniteZ Hitter Of Note: Keon Broxton went 0-9 and kept getting sat for Brett Phillips and now he is demoted to AAA and I am REALLY QUITE SAD ABOUT IT (0/9, .100 OBP).

MooniniteZ Pitcher Of Note: Also Lance McCullers has failed to get through the 5th inning 3 starts in a row but THIS IS FINE EVERYTHING IS FINE WE ARE FINE (9.1 IP, 10 ER, 8 Ks, 9.64 ERA).

ASSORTED MUSINGS/ANALYSIS: I just do not really wanna talk about this one all that much. But if I were to repeat the theme from a matchup from above and ask just HOW this one turned out this way the answer would be DONGS. All the dongs. This one was neck and neck heading into the last 2 days of the matchup, MooniniteZ may have had a narrow edge even, and then the Isotopes just up and socked 13 HRs and knocked in 18 Runs over those final two days. The ‘Topes tied their season record with 24 HRs and would have actually exceeded it had they not sat Paul DeJong on Sunday night, in fact they sat a bunch of players just to preserve their margin of victory but I said I wouldn’t criticize it and I WON’T. Smart managing from a tough team, which is what I will call this team because it features the only current owner to have defeated my team in 2017. Speaking of my team, they pitched like shit in Week 15. NOT ALOTTA QUALITY AS USUAL (3 QS, 5.629 ERA), and the Isotopes also pitched pretty poorly but at least had some Wins to show for it and that’s how all of this went down. The Isotopes will now head to Lacey having won 2 straight, in one of the more important matchups in a time where all matchups are fairly important. The MooniniteZ have had their NON-LOSING STREAK snapped at 8 and will now have to take on a tough-in-every-category-but-Saves RRF squad. I think our “Magic Number” is kinda like ONE to clinch a bye if not the outright #1 seed but that is too math-y to talk about right now check back after I grab this next dub.

Next Week aka This Week: Isotopes v. BDSliderz ( #4 or #3 v. #7 or #6), MooniniteZ v. RRF (#1 v. #6 or #7)

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Barnegat Banana Slugs Cheat Again And Win Again, This Time Defeating The River City Bad Dudes – 8-4-1

MVP: Jonathon Schoop – Jonathon Schoop had a lot of RBIs. 13/30, 8 Rs, 2 2Bs, 3 HRs, 16 RBIs, .438 OBP

LVP: Nomar Mazara – As suggested by Lobman himself, and BOY was he right on this one. 0/21, .192 OBP ***LVP OF THE WEEK***

Banana Slugs Hitter Of Note: Jake Lamb had a lot of RBIs but not as many RBIs as Jonathon Schoop (6/19, 5 Rs, 1 2B, 2 HRs, 4 RBIs, 5 SBs, .294 OBP).

Banana Slugs Pitcher Of Note: Brent Suter with a CHEATING QUALITY START OF LIES on Saturday (10.2 IP, 3 ER, 7 Ks, 1 QS, 2.53 ERA).

Bad Dudes Hitter Of Note: On the bright side of the Bad Dudes News AJ Pollock looked good last week so he can overhype (fake word) and overrate him in the chat or whatever, he will probably do something like that (9/22, 8 Rs, 3 2Bs, 2 3Bs, 1 HR, 2 RBIs, 3 SBs, .409 OBP).

Bad Dudes Pitcher Of Note: Jon Lester was good twice last week and I hate that I am always writing his name on this thing, only the worst people spell it J-o-n (15 IP, 3 ER, 16 Ks, 2 QS, 2 Ws, 1.80 ERA).

ASSORTED MUSINGS/ANALYSIS: Once again displaying a “win at any cost especially if that cost is merely cheating a little bit attitude”, the Banana Slugs continued their assault on the standings and on integrity with yet another tainted W that rockets them up to the #2 seed with really the ONLY decent shot I see of dethroning the #1. Brent Suter tossed a quality start on Saturday, and I feel oddly compelled to point out Starling Marte‘s stats for reasons I can’t fully articulate: 9/27, 6 Rs, 2 RBIs, 3 SBs, .379 OBP. Not a bad week, on the base paths at least, for the recently-returned cheater. Nor for the Banana Slugs team as a whole, as they posted an impressive 65 Runs and 69 RBIs and I think 60+ in those two categories is just flat out tough to beat. And maybe that is why the Bad Dudes flat out failed to beat em. The Bad Dudes can take solace in a league-best 91 Ks, one better than the X-Rayz and two better than the Titans and they are the only one of these three teams that didn’t win last week FUN WITH NUMBERS. ANYWHOM, the streaking/rule-straddling Banana Slugs now arrive in Q-Tip City having won four straight, one W away from tying the season high 5 week win streaks of the former 3PO. The River City Bad Dudes, on the other hand, head into Week 16 having stumbled a bit (2 straight losses, 3-5 over their last 8). And uhhh yea that’s where these two teams are at.

Next Week aka This Week: Banana Slugs v. Morning Wood (#2 v. #10), Bad Dudes v. Titans (#5 or #4 or #3 v. #9)

2017 WEEK 15 MATCHUP OF THE WEEK, SPONSORED BY THE CGI GREAT WHITE SHARK THAT WHOOPED MICHAEL PHELPS’ ASS IN A RACE LAST NIGHT

MLB: Boston Red Sox at Baltimore Orioles

Point Loma X-Rayz Grab Crucial Victory (Via Grichuk) Over Lacey Township BackdoorSliderz – 7-6-1

MVP: Trey Mancini – NICE LITTLE WEEK for Trey Mancini and he deserves more respect than he was given from this rude ass league following his trade to the X-Rayz on the 10th of July. Shame on all of you.8/26, 3 Rs, 1 2B, 1 3B, 1 HR, 7 RBIs, .357 OBP

LVP: Jonathon Lucroy – Jonathon Lucroy what has BECOME of you this year, last year you were somethin’ special. 1/19, 1 2B, 1 R, .182 OBP

X-Rayz Hitter Of Note: Billy Hamilton got back to being a fantasy asset this week, after scuffling a bit here and there, and I say good for Billy (10/26, 4 Rs, 1 2B, 1 3B, 2 RBIs, 4 SBs, .370 OBP).

X-Rayz Pitcher Of Note: And also BRAD PEACOCK, everyone should be paying more attention to Brad Peacock he’s going deep into games now and everything (7 IP, 1 ER, 9 Ks, 1 QS, 1 W, 1.29 ERA).

BDSliderz Wood Hitter Of Note: Michael Comforto is back to slugging after taking the month of June off from slugging (12/28, 5 Rs, 3 2Bs, 4 HRs, 7 RBIs, .484 OBP).

BDSliderz Pitcher Of Note: And also JULIO TEHERAN with two strong starts in which the Braves failed to find him any goddamned run support (12.1 IP, 5 ER, 11 Ks, 2 QS, 3.65 ERA).

ASSORTED MUSINGS/ANALYSIS: RANDAL GRICHUK nearly grabbed himself MVP on this one despite being a worthless FA. That is how this one shook out. Truth be told it went well down to the wire, with the BackdoorSliderz grabbing the temporary tie thanks to an IMPROBABLE 9th inning Matt Adams dong that allowed Freddie Freeman to score the 40th run for Lacey Twp. However the X-Rayz still had a one Yadi Molina in the Sunday night game and he promptly singled to lead off that game’s 2nd inning and then Grichuk promptly put one in the seats, giving the X-Rayz their matchup-winning 41st Run. This one was equally close in the RBIs cat with both teams posting sub-40 RBI weeks, which is a new line I just decided to denote a serviceable or good RBI week vs. a not that serviceable or bad RBI week. Anyways the X-Rayz won the not that serviceable RBI week 37-36, credit due to Mancini and weirdly Andrelton Simmons and even weirdlier Nick Williams. GRABBING PRODUCTION WHEREVER THEY CAN. With the victory the X-Rayz improved to 6-2 over their last 8, and they will now head to OceanGate and attempt to put a nail or two in a coffin. With the loss the BackdoorSliderz slide out of the playoffs, at least temporarily, as they’ve now gone 2-6 over their last 8 in a bit of a reverse Odom. They will take on a REALLY TOUGH Astoria team in Week 16, toughest I’ve faced I’ll say that much.

Next Week aka This Week: X-Rayz v. OGTFC (#3 or #4 v. #8), BDSliderz v. Isotopes (#7 or #6 v. #4 or #3)

WEEK 15 OVER AND TRADE DEADLINE THIS SATURDAY AT NOON. THAT IS PROBABLY THE ONLY NEWS WORTH NOTING HERE. I REPEAT AGAIN TRADE DEADLINE THIS SATURDAY AT NOON. ALSO THREE WEEKS LEFT FOR ONE OF YOU FUCKS TO TRY AND PULL OFF SOME SORT OF MIRACLE AND STEAL MY #1 SEED.

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Wild Dog Mitch Russo’s Hot Takes

July 20, 2017 Michael OdomLeave a comment

The Russo Report

The Wild Dog Mitch Russo with his picks in key Hot Stove categories, as well 5 trades he would like to see happen before the 7/29 trade deadline.

5 Guys Who Will Not Be Traded

X-Rayz RP Aroldis Chapman

10 saves, 3.42 ERA, 1.44 WHIP, 35 Ks

Despite some hot headed outburst by management on a handful of Backyard Radio Broadcasts AND legitimate preliminary discussions involving Chapman at the time, I have no reason to believe the flamethrower will be headed out of Point Loma. While still maintaining impressive value despite his sub-par patch, management has opted to bolster the bullpen via trade at a heavy cost. They are banking on Chapman returning to form and galvanizing a new and improved back end down the playoff stretch.

Mooninitez SP Lance McCullers Jr.

19.1 IP, 22 K, 1 W, 6.05 ERA over last 30 days

One rough patch for this fireballing youngster and the buy low offers come in rolling into Moonz headquarters. GM Sean McLaughlin is known for not selling low on players, instead riding through rough times for the right amount of talent. Teams are kidding themselves if they think this 23 year old is leaving the gravitational pull of the Moonz rotation any time in the near future.

Titans 3B/RF Miguel Sano

22 HRs, 63 RBIs, .370 OBP

The light has finally flicked on for the long time highly touted prospect, and his monster 2017 home run showing Is drawing heavy interest from rival GMs. Unfortunately for them, the Titans A) cherish Sano as a powerful corner IF/OF and B) have a surplus of pitchers and a deficiency of talent in the lineup. Any deal for Sano would cost an equal or better bat, thus making a trade all but pointless at this juncture for all parties involved.

Isotopes 1B/LF Cody Bellinger

26 HRs, 62 RBIs, .356 OBP

The offers for the multipositional young playboy came rolling during and immediately following the HR Derby, and interest remains at a fever pitch. The Isotopes have refused to engage in talks for Bellinger, and it’s hard to argue with that stance. Teams are trying to catch Mikey T napping, and it plain ain’t gonna happen.

Renegades RF Nelson Cruz

6 HRs, 21 RBIs, .363 OBP over last 30 days

A few weeks ago, Nelly Cruz was shaping up to be a tremendous get for a playoff bound team. His stock was down slightly from years past due to a down year by his standards, and the Renegades were fading. Fast forward to today: the Renegades have gone 2-0-1 and Nelly has heated up in that stretch. With Rojo and the Force back in the hunt, the red hot Cruz suddenly plays a big part in their 2017 plans and has likely played himself out of bargain value bin.

5 Guys That Will Be Traded

Mooninitez SP Alex Reyes

#9 MLB.com, #9 Baseball Prospectus, #12 Baseball America Prospect

With the Moonz looking to lock in a second consecutive bye shortly, there is no reason to believe this team isn’t a favorite to win the BCS. GM Sean McLaughlin has always viewed prospects more as trade chips than building blocks, and despite being sidelined with TJ, Reyes could still garner a great haul. The roster lacks any serious holes, but the rotation and bullpen could use one more difference making arm to put Manchester’s Finest over the top in 2017. Reyes could be the guy to get them that arm.

Morning Wood SP Zack Grienke

131 Ks, 10 QS, 11 W, 1 CG, 2.86 ERA

Not many soon to be 34 year old pitchers carry the kind of 2018 upside that Grienke does, and his stellar 2017 only enhances his value. Zack is only 2 season removed from a 1.66 ERA over 222.2 IP, and carries a 2.98 ERA over his 7 years in National League play. With pitching being a true rollercoaster ride for GMs this season, the bidding for Grienke has already begun. An ace of his caliber should draw a great return for the rebuilding Morning Wood.

Isotopes 1B Wil Myers

17 HRs, 43 RBIs, 10 SBs, .332 OBP

In a shocking turn of events, the Isotopes suddenly have enough young depth to shop a 26 year old 2016 All Star. Last season’s 28/28 HR/SB has not been replicated thus far this year, but that does not mean it can’t happen again. If they attempt to add to what they have deemed to be a championship contender, the ‘Topes can basically shore up any issue they desire by trading Myers and sliding Bellinger or Reynolds into his spot in the lineup.

Morning Wood SP Ervin Santana

94 Ks, 13 QS, 11 Ws, 4 CGs 2.99 ERA

With all of the holes in Q-Tip City, there is simply no way they can carry a soon to be 35 year old starting pitcher having a career season through the trade deadline. While he screams regression and has many miles on his tires, his 4 complete games this year have established him as a legitimate threat to go the distance any time he takes the mound. His ERA is 1.34 runs below the league average, and a pitching starved contender may part with a solid trade piece come Deadline Day for The Artist Formerly Known as Johan Santana. My prediction is that he ends up in a package deal out of Q-Tip City.

Trout Fishing Club OF Eloy Jimenez

#8 MLB.com, #8 Baseball Prospectus, #5 Baseball America Prospect

The defending champion OGTFC are in the midst of a WEIRD TIED LADEN season. Injuries have ravaged an All-World lineup, and GM Heroy is finally being forced to show tactical skills. With long term talent in surplus, Ocean Gate has openly shopped the highly touted power OF in an attempt to bolster their 2017 roster. Any team’s considered sellers should be highly interested in the ChiTown bopper to be.

5 Players That Must Be Traded

Morning Wood SP Carlos Martinez

133 Ks, 13 QS,6 Ws, 1 CG, 3.36 ERA

One of the few (if any) trades the Morning Wood have won thus far resulted in them acquiring Cardinals ace Carlos Martinez. As a rebuilding team, you would think C-Mart should be a piece of the long term foundation. But allow me to play Devi’s Advocate: The soon to be 26 year old holds immense trade value that has only been increased by the volatile 2017 pitching market. He is more towards a 1a or 2 in a fantasy rotation, and that’s why I believe management should cash in on their arm while the iron is hot. They have already traded away their pair of 1s (Bumgarner and Thor), and need to add depth and pieces across the board. The collective haul from C-Mart/Grienke trades would bolster the team immensely if done right.

Titans SP Yu Darvish

131 Ks, 14 QS, 6 Ws, 3.45 ERA

In a RARE MOMENT OF WEAKNESS, TItans GM Ryan McLaughlin overplayed his hand on 5/22. He sent Rafael Denvers, Yasiel Puig, and George Springer out of town for Matt Kemp and Yu Darvish. Following in the footsteps of Odom (speed) and Rojo (holds), Ryan went overboard in the pitching category in a momentary fit of madness. Several weeks later and with the 2017 season slipping away, the Titans need to do their best to undo the damage created to their once vaunted lineup. The aforementioned pitching market is as in demand as ever, and a bidding war for Yu could reach All-Star caliber levels. Considering he would be the 5^th best starter in TR come Opening Day 2018 and pitchers at peak value, this is an easy no brainer.

Banana Slugs SP Luis Severino

130 Ks, 11 QS, 5 Ws, 3.40 ERA

Another young arm, another case of a team perhaps cashing in on the hot pitcher trade market. Following the retirement of Big Papi, the BBS have seen a sharp decline in their power numbers in 2017. A playoff run is all but certain this year, and one more impact bat could be the final piece to a BCS puzzle. Considering the depth in the Slugs rotation (Max, Arrieta, Porcello, Nova, Gray) and a top prospect in Brent Honeywell paired with the harsh reality that long term aces in the AL East are few and far between, and all signs point to it being sell time in Barnegat on their Bronx Bomber.

Morning Wood SP Jacob Faria

41 Ks, 7 QS, 4 Ws, 2.00 ERA

It was possibly a foolish decision to trade for such an unknown as a team that was falling out of contention, and the Wood need to cash In while they can on this young upstart. His value is near an all time high considering his pedigree and insane start in 2017, and a pitching starved contender may pay a shiny penny in the prospect game to acquire Faria. His numbers this season don’t reflect his long term potential and Q-Tip City would be foolish to include him in their rebuilding plan. They need cornerstones, not contributors.

Morning Wood RP Felipe Rivero

60 Ks, 4 Ws, 8 SVs, 14 HDs

The 26 year old recently named closer in Pittsburgh is striking out batters at 10.7 per 9 clip, and ranks only behind Kenley Jansen in RP ESPN Player Rater score in 2017. His value to the rebuilding Morning Wood is minimal, where as a contender with a hole in the bullpen would love to add this potential Bucco beast. Rivero is by far the best reliever among the teams considered to be sellers before the deadline, and a bidding war combined with a hot July could end up in dollar signs for Q-Tip City.

5 Trades We Would Like To See Happen

Morning Wood trade SP Zack Grienke to OGTFC for C/1B Buster Posey

A bit old for the desires of GM Shane McCann, Posey still brings star power and name value to a decimated franchise. He would lock down the backstop position for years to come. Grienke would instantly slot into the top end of the Fishing Club’s rotation, and there is no reason to believe he won’t be very effective in 2018 as well. Gotta spend money to make money!

Moonz trade SP Alex Reyes, OF Ronald Acuna, OF Steven Souza, OF Lewis Brinson to Morning Wood for SP Carlos Martinez, RP Felipe Rivero

QUITE the hefty price we are asking of the Moonz here, all but gutting their farm system in this deal. But by placing an electric starter like C-Mart into that rotation and letting Rivero step in and close and the #1 seed becomes that much more deadly, as a 2017 BCS Title is very much in reach. Souza is a 28 year old OF that will likely hit 30 bombs this year, Acuna and Brinson are 2 premiere outfield prospects, and Reyes has the potential to be even better than Martinez in the coming years. This is a blockbuster win/win in our opinion.

Rojo’s Renegades trade SP Julio Urias to Morning Wood for SP Gio Gonzalez

2 birds with 1 stone for the Renegades here, as they can add to their injury depleted rotation for a playoff push as well as open up a precious Major League roster spot. Gio is having a stellar season that is even more impressive considering the league’s pitching issues, and going on age 32 still has some tread perhaps. The Morning Wood have roster space to spare and would be wise to roll the dice on a player that has been compared to Sandy Koufax, regardless of injury concerns.

Astoria Isotopes trade 1B Wil Myers to Barnegat Banana Slugs for SP Luis Severino and LF Brett Gardner

The Slugs can add a long term 5 tool bat to their lineup, while the Isotopes finally cave in and admit they could use another starting arm. The Pinstripe Power of Severino and Gardner pluck at the heartstrings of GM Mikey T, giving Astoria a pair of 23 year olds in the rotation (Severio and Berrios) to match the deadly duo of Bellinger and Judge. Myers goes a long way towards replacing Big Papi’s production in 2017 and in the future, while the Slugs staff can withstand the loss of Severino.

Toms River Titans trade SP Noah Syndergaard, 3B Yoan Moncada, and RP Brad Hand to Lacey BackdoorSliderz for 1B Freddie Freeman and SP Jose De Leon

This one is 100% wild speculation unfounded in any truth, but boy would it be fun. BDSliderz GM Sean Dochney turns into Homer Simpson and trades pairs Thor with deGrom for the long term future. Freeman’s loss would be a huge hit to the 2017 playoff push, but Moncada brings long term value that offsets that. Brad Hand could be a deadly bullpen weapon if traded to a contender and his peaked his value this season. Freddie would go a long way towards stabilizing a weakened lineup for the Titans, perhaps becoming their best hitter upon arrival. De Leon would be a throw in that still holds great upside from the mound.

Signing off,

Mitch Russo

Editors Note: Between the writing and publishing of this report, Ervin Santana was traded to the River City Bad Dudes.

2017 Week 14 Review: With Team By Team All Star Tally For Some Reason

July 18, 2017February 25, 2018 AnActualBearLeave a comment

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WE HERE AT THE BLOG LIKE NOTHING MORE THAN TO ADD SOME USELESS SHIT IN WITH THE REVIEWS IN ORDER TO MAKE THEM APPEAR LONGER AND MORE IN-DEPTH THAN THEY PROBABLY ARE. SO WITHOUT FURTHER ADO, HERE IS HOW MANY ALL STARS EACH TEAM IN THE OLE BACKYARD ENDED UP WITH…..

OH BUT FIRST LET ME NOTE A TRADE WAS MADE:

RCBD traded Willie Calhoun, LAD 2B to JF16
RCBD traded Bud Norris, LAA RP to JF16
JF16 traded Archie Bradley, Ari SP to RCBD
JF16 traded Stephen Gonsalves, Min SP to RCBD

This trade was already well-covered in the chat, I think Odom is angry or something? Calhoun is maybe fat? I’ll do a Calhoun comp since Gonslaves lasted about 2 minutes on the Bad Dudes roster. Willie Calhoun Major League Comparison: RONNIE BELLIARD for the old timers, Jhonny Peralta for current timers. This was fun.

Okay now onto the All-Stars

1- Manchester MooniniteZ (9-2-3)

ALL STARS (8): Nolan Arenado, Justin Smoak, Joey Votto, Gary Sanchez, Lance McCullers Jr., Kenley Jansen, Josh Harrison, Alex Wood.

2- River City Bad Dudes (8-5-1)

ALL STARS (4): Bryce Harper, Giancarlo Stanton, Wade Davis, Craig Kimbrel

3- Barnegat Banana Slugs (8-5-1)

ALL STARS (8): Max Scherzer, Ryan Zimmerman, Salvador Perez, Luis Severino, Jonathan Schoop, Jake Lamb, DJ LeMahieu, Ender Inciarte.

4- Point Loma X-Rayz (7-5-2)

ALL STARS (8): Jose Ramirez, Dellin Betances, Jason Vargas, Daniel Murphy, Robbie Ray, Yadier Molina, Roberto Osuna, Chris Devenski.

5- Lacey Township BackdoorSliderz (4-7-3)

ALL STARS (5): Jose Altuve, Yonder Alonso, Marcel Ozuna, Corey Knebel, Michael Conforto.

6- Astoria Isotopes (6-5-3)

ALL STARS (9 NOPE 8): Charlie Blackmon, Cody Bellinger, Greg Holland, Aaron Judge, ~~Starlin Castro~~ (UPDATE: DROPPED), Dallas Keuchel, Mike Moustakas, Jason Vargas, Brandon Kintzler.

7- OceanGate Trout Fishing Club (7-5-2)

ALL STARS (7): Mike Trout, Mookie Betts, Andrew Miller, Michael Brantley, Buster Posey, Corey Seager, Justin Turner.

8- Rojo’s Renegade Force (6-7-1)

ALL STARS (6): George Springer, Corey Kluber, Michael Fulmer, Nelson Cruz, Paul Goldschmidt, Zack Cozart.

9- Toms River Titans (5-9)

ALL STARS (7): Carlos Correa, Francisco Lindor, Miguel Sano, Yu Darvish, Chris Sale, Clayton Kershaw, Stephen Strasburg.

10- Q-Tip City Morning Wood (3-11)

ALL STARS (5): Corey Dickerson, Ervin Santana, Carlos Martinez, Zack Greinke, Justin Upton.

SO……..I mean there is all your All Stars. KINDA BALANCED. For reference last year the OGTFC and the MooniniteZ were tied with the most selections at 12, followed by the Bulldogs at 11. Two teams (X-Rayz and Cuban Missiles) had only 3 selections. Now that this particular brand of article fluff is out of the way let’s look at what went down in Week 14, as we then look ahead to the FINAL FOUR……weeks. Of the regular season.

Rojo’s Renegade Force Batter River City Bad Dudes, Build Bridge Toward Back End of Backyard Playoff Bracket – 11-1-2

MVP: Scooter Gennett – FUCKING SCOOTER GENNETT making an appearance in the MVP sections. He has 16 HRs this season and is stealing Jose Peraza‘s job. Baseball is magical. 11/29, 7 Rs, 1 2B, 4 HRs, 12 RBIs, 1 SB, .455 OBP

LVP: Chris Davis – The Renegade Force CRUSHED the Bad Dudes here and ironically enough I am partly blaming CRUSH Davis himself, because he arrived towards the tail end of the matchup and he did NOT provide the spark needed to uhhh get less crushed. And I mean most of the rest of the team didn’t perform that terribly (a few pitchers but SUCH IS LIFE when trying to get to 24 starts). 1/11, 1 2B, 1 RBI, .167 OBP

RRF Hitter Of Note: Nelson Cruz also had himself a week, allllll hail Nelly Cruz (9/31, 5 Rs, 5 HRs, 12 RBIs, .353 OBP).

RRF Pitcher Of Note: Michael Fulmer with the EXTREMELY RARE 3 QS 3 W week, but I ask where are the strikeouts Michael (22 IP, 6 ER, 9 Ks, 3 QS, 3 Ws, 2.45 ERA).

Bad Dudes Hitter Of Note: Giancarlo Stanton may have gotten knocked out of the first round of the HR derby in his home stadium, but at least he gets a “Bad Dudes Hitter Of Note” shoutout here (12/38, 10 Rs, 3 2Bs, 5 HRs, 10 RBIs, .409 OBP).

Bad Dudes Pitcher Of Note: Sonny Gray was Sonny Okay last week (I am sorry) so this means that both the Athletics and the Bad Dudes should just trade him immediately (12 IP, 2 ER, 10 Ks, 2 QS, 2 Ws, 1.50 ERA).

STATEMENT GAME for the Renegade Force, as they raided River City and stomped out the Bad Dudes and declared “HEY we kinda wanna make the playoffs too” in Week 14. And HEY maybe they will, and if they do they just might point to this week as a lil bit of a catalyst just a lil bit. RRF continues to be the cream of the crop when it comes to power numbers in the BCL, which may or may not be a thing, and that was unfortunate news for the Bad Dudes whom put together very strong power numbers themselves in the extended week. NOT STRONG ENOUGH, as they would come to find out. Normally I would maybe spare a sentence or two about how the different categories were won by the Renegade Force but in this case it’s just easier to point out what the Bad Dudes won: Saves, they won Saves because RRF don’t have any closers. Also both teams tied with a strong 4 Triples and both teams failed to record a CG, and that is how you score this massacre. BOTH TEAMS STARTED 24, amicably, so good on them. Rojo’s Renegade Force will look to continue to build momentum towards a ticket to the playoffs when they take on the Q-Tip City Morning Wood, aka the BOTTOM FEEDER OF THE LEAGUE, in Week 15. Nice. For the Bad Dudes they must now head to Barnegat for a PIVOTAL battle between dueling 8-5-1 records, with the #2 Seed and 2nd first round bye on the line. Exciting.

Next Week aka This Week: RRF v. Morning Wood (#8 v. #10), Bad Dudes v. Banana Slugs (#3 v. #2 OR #2 v. #3 KINDA JUMBLED, the result of this one should un-jumble)

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Lacey Township BackdoorSliderz Pummel Toms River Titans, Parade Back Into Playoff Picture – 11-2-1

MVP: Jose Altuve – Altuve remains really good on an offense that is absolutely ridiculous right now and yea…….DOCH REALLY LUCKED OUT WITH THIS ONE. Not sure what the rest of the roster looked like at the time but I know it had Altuve and that ain’t bad. 20/36, 12 Rs, 4 2Bs, 3 HRs, 11 RBIs, 3 SBs, .610 OBP ***MVP OF THE WEEK***

LVP: Tyler Chatwood – Does having 3 extra games allow players sucking enough time to corect their numbers so that they are less sucky? I ASK BECAUSE I keep having a tough time assigning an LVP here. So anyways I’ll just give it to Tyler Chatwood in this case, since he got one out and gave up 4 runs. And that out was NOT via strikeout. So not good at all. 0.1 IP, 4 ER, 108.00 OBP

BDSliderz Hitter Of Note: Freddie Freeman returned and PROMPTLY picked up right the fuck where he left off, even played some third base (11/34, 8 Rs, 3 2Bs, 3 HRs, 10 RBIs, .378 OBP).

BDSliderz Pitcher Of Note: Jacob Degrom, a bright light in yet another not particularly well luminated Mets season (15 IP, 5 ER, 16 Ks, 1 QS, 2 Ws, 3.00 ERA).

Titans Hitter Of Note: I for one am happy to see that Anthony Rendon is back, even if I don’t particularly trust him and would probably trade him if I was Head Titan (14/28, 7 Rs, 3 2Bs, 3 HRs, 12 RBIs, 1 SB, .600 OBP).

Titans Pitcher Of Note: I like how whenever people get the chance they try and annoint someone else the best pitcher in baseball but NO IT IS CLAYTON KERSHAW AND IT WILL ALWAYS BE CLAYTON KERSHAW (16 IP, 2 ER, 24 Ks, 2 QS, 2 Ws, 1 CG, 1.13 ERA).

And just like that Lacey Township is back in the dance, as a dominant victory over the TR Titans in Week 14 vaults them all the way up to the 5th seed or the 4th seed who can tell it will be clear later. A pretty solid victory here pretty much across the board for the BDSliderz, as a superior OBP and a Clayton Kershaw CG were the only things preventing the TR Titans from getting swept across all cats. Lacey Township would end up starting 18 to the 16 starts used by the TR Titans. but this one was well out of reach for TR so the blog shall not fault them for not pressing for extra hurlers. The BDSliderz ended up TIED for the most Doubles in Week 14 (there was some talk about an “8 day record” that will NOT be acknowledge beyond this parenthesis) and actually pitched to the only sub-3 ERA of the week (2.813), an impressive feat considering the extra starts involved. Oh and they scored the most Runs in the week, with 83. For the Titans this just amounted to a bit of a tough draw, as their offensive numbers were fairly competitive but just not good enough against a really strong performance from those backwoods hicks down in Lacey. ANYWHO, the BackdoorSliderz head into Week 15 having won 2 straight after losing the previous 5 and they have a yuuuuuge matchup with the Point Loma X-Rayz on tap. The Toms River Titans will limp into battle with the OGTFC, and they would need a ton of help to sniff a playoff spot (if it is even possible I suspect it might not be with the way teams play each other yada yada) as they now stand 3 back from the 6th seed with 4 to play. SAD CIRCUMSTANCES as the two-time champs look destined to miss the playoffs for the second season in a row; there’s probably some story arc here about how maybe pitching DOESN’T win championships in the BCL but now is not the time for eulogizing.

Next Week aka This Week: BDSliderz v. X-Rayz (#5 v. #4 or #4 v. #5 WHOM KNOWS but this matchup will clear this shit up), Titans v. OGTFC (#9 v. #7)

Colorado Rockies v Arizona Diamondbacks

Astoria Isotopes Push Past Q-Tip City Morning Wood, Possibly Positioning Themselves For Playoffs Push – 7-6-1

MVP: Charlie Blackmon – CHARLIE out here rocking a JROLL on the extended week and doing big thangs and doing them so well that I was able to just reuse a picture that I used last week or some shit. DO YOUR THANGS CHARLIE. 16/42, 10 Rs, 2 2Bs, 1 3B, 4 HRs, 6 RBIs, 3 SBs, .422 OBP

LVP: Mitch Haniger – MITCH out here doing more or less the opposite of what I talked about Charlie doing up there, but to his credit both of his hits were of the extra base variety. ONE WAS EVEN A DONG. Not sure Mitch Haniger arrived the way everyone claimed he was going to arrive but yanno, whatever, still might be time for that to happen…. or whatever. 2/18, 1 R, 1 2B, 1 HR, 1 RBI, .158 OBP

Isotopes Hitter Of Note: Cody Bellinger hit for the cycle on that one day but NO we are going to note Paul Dejong cuz I mean who the fuck is he even (12/28, 5 Rs, 6 2Bs, 3 HRs, 4 RBIs, .448 OBP)?

Isotopes Pitcher Of Note: Cole Hamels is BACK, I almost forgot he was in baseball for a moment there (15.1 IP, 0 ER, 11 Ks, 2 QS, 1 Ws, 0.00 ERA).

Morning Wood Hitter Of Note: Jay Bruce seems to be doing decent, SURELY both the Mets and the Morning Wood should trade him and SURELY they will both fuck that trade up (11/34, 7 Rs, 2 2Bs, 4 HRs, 7 RBIs, .343 OBP).

Morning Wood Pitcher Of Note: GODDAMMIT Ervin Santana once again threw a complete game, why must he keep doing this he’s not even good WHAT DOES HE WANT (15 IP, 4 ER, 8 Ks, 2 QS, 1 W, 1 CG, 2.40 ERA)?!

The Astoria Isotopes drew the team that hasn’t won since Week 2 in Week 14 and TO THEIR CREDIT, nearly lost to em. However they did not so this is a less enjoyable write up to write….up. The ‘Topes managed to squeak by here in part due to a few helpful Triples, in part due to their typical HR prowess, and in part due to the impressive ability of the Bonerz to NOT score Runs (Topes won that cat 76-53, second lowest total for the week was 65 out in OceanGate). QTC REALLY GOOD AT NOT SCORING RUNS. The Erectionz actually pitched pretty solidly (11 QS, 1 CG) and Doubled pretty solidly (36) and EVEN got awarded an 8 day tie of the Saves record when they reached 11 (ended up with 12). But yanno, they still haven’t won since Week 2. With the victory the Astoria Isotopes managed to hang onto the #6 Seed, they now continue their tour of the Manchester teams when they take on the #1 Seed in Week 15. With the loss the 2017 version of the Morning Wood remain HOPELESS, but yanno there’s always 2018. And maybe they don’t do terribly at the trade deadline and maybe they win one more before the year closes out. Fantasy, not unlike life, is full of possibilities.

Next Week aka This Week: Isotopes v. MooniniteZ (#6 v. #1), Morning Wood v. RRF (#10 v. #8)

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Barnegat Banana Slugs BETRAY BOND OF BROTHERHOOD (that is implied with any gentlemen’s agreement) BY BEATING OceanGate Trout Fishing Club BEHIND BLOATED BATCH OF STARTS – 7-6-1

MVP: Rick Porcello – And Jorge saves the day. And ended up dropped for his troubles anyways. But yea without De La Rosa’s 0.1 IP hold on Sunday afternoon coupled with a blown hold from the guy below, without those two events this would have been a loss for the MooniniteZ. Instead it was another dumb tie REJOICE. 3.1 IP, 1 ER, 1 K, 1 Hold, 2.70 ERA

LVP: HONOR – Honor was not very valuable in this matchup. ***LVP OF THE WEEK***

Banana Slugs Hitter Of Note: NOT DESERVED

Banana Slugs Pitcher Of Note: NOT DESERVED

OGTFC Hitter Of Note: NOT DESERVED

OGTFC Pitcher Of Note: NOT DESERVED

While I DID once again at least bang out MVP/LVP and all that shit for this matchup, I will ALSO once again refuse to really discuss it. Let’s cue up what I wrote the lastttt time the Slugs got all salty in the chat and just make a few slight edits:

The sad part is I want to give the Banana Slugs a bunch of credit here for overcoming injuries time and again this season, but that has been slightly overshadowed by what was by all accounts an embarrassing display in the chat on Friday ~~evening~~ afternoon I think? following a decision made by Slugs management and Slugs management alone to go back on some agreed upon number of starts because they felt they were uhhh tricked into it? Coerced in some way? They just didn’t wanna anymore? WHATEVER the case the issue was never really about a LEAGUE PERMITTED number of starts or whatever, the chat logs clearly showed that (bad) idea was scrapped pretty quickly and everyone is free to start as many as ESPN allows in a given week EVEN IF they agree to a lesser number. I mean I can reach an agreement to only start 6 this week should I choose to. And then I can also choose to start a bunch of extra starters the last day and BETRAY that trust. But I mean that’s probably a bad look and I would have to be understanding of that being a bad look. Is what I think. the news of an Adam Eaton injury. Every team deals with injuries and the # of DL spots has been JUST FINE for many seasons now and until I see evidence of 10 day DL abuse (which could only be seen after a full season and not just after a fucking April) I don’t believe there should be any talk of additional DL spots. Punishment for whining is that I only talk about the whining and not about the matchup and there was whining on both sides here. CONGRATS ON THE VICTORY TO THE BARNEGAT BANANA SLUGS THOUGH.

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Next Week aka This Week: Banana Slugs v. Bad Dudes (#2 v. #3 or #3 v. #2 FUCK IF I KNOW but this matchup should sort it out), OGTFC v. Titans (#7 v. #9)

2017 WEEK 14 MATCHUP OF THE WEEK, SPONSORED BY ALLITERATION

Manchester MooniniteZ Pinch Past Point Loma X-Rayz, Presently Poised To Pounce On Preliminary Round Bye – 7-6-1

MVP: Jimmy Nelson – Let’s give this one to JIMMAYYYYY for supplying me with a bunch of Ks and some QS and some Ws, sure he needed 3 starts to do it but STILL. Jimmy Nelson has actually been really good since the calendar hit May and isn’t given enough credit for it, SUB 3 ERA every month that wasn’t April. All hail the unlikely breakout of Jimmy Nelson. 18.2 IP, 5 ER, 23 Ks, 2 QS, 2 Ws, 2.41 ERA

LVP: Cameron Maybin – Maybin came on board for the extended weekend and got himself a cute little angels in the outfield GIF in the chat and everything and he came in and gave NOTHING and took away from OBP, not good Cameron. 0/11, .154 OBP

MooniniteZ Hitter Of Note: Andrew McCutchen was the BIG OLEEEE run scorer in a week where the MooniniteZ only won the Run cat by 1 so uhhh way to go Andrew (15/40, 10 Rs, 4 2Bs, 3 HRs, 4 RBIs, .444 OBP).

MooniniteZ Pitcher Of Note: Alex Wood is Alex GOOD (so sorry again), but no really Alex Wood has been pretty fucking unreal is what I am trying to tell you people (13 IP, 0 ER, 14 Ks, 2 QS, 2 Ws, 0.00 ERA).

X-Rayz Hitter Of Note: Jose Ramirez had himself a JROLL but Daniel Murphy had himself a(n extended) WEEK, well I guess they both had themselves a(n extended) week but Murphy lead the league in RBIs (15/31, 7 Rs, 5 2Bs, 2 HRs, 16 RBIs, .500 OBP).

X-Rayz Pitcher Of Note: David Price FAILED in his bid to get a week-tying CG on Sunday night but he has been very very good and seems to have recovered nicely from all that ailed him earlier in the season (20 IP, 2 ER, 22 Ks, 3 QS, 2 Ws, 0.90 ERA).

The MooniniteZ and X-Rayz nearrrrrrrrrly battled to a second tie in Week 14, which would have been the 3rd straight tie for the MooniniteZ, and quite frankly the MooniniteZ were rooting for it. UNFORTUNATELY by the time the Sunday night game rolled around that was only possible with a David Price QS/CG OR a QS and a Whichever Yankees Reliever Save, and then even more unfortunately Price came out dealing so it quickly became apparent the Yankees W probably wasn’t happening. And then most unfortunately Price ended up at 107 pitches through 8 and the Sawks understandably went to Kimbrel in the 9th, and so here we are. A CLOSE BATTLE through and through as 5 cats came down to a differential of 1 and OBP came down to a differential of uhhhh .0045 (notably the MooniniteZ would win Runs 70-69 and OBP .3239-.3194). The X-Rayz would impressively rack up 60 RBIs with only 14 HRs, but ’twas not enough to best the 67 RBIs (22 HRs) from the MM. Woulda preferred a tie (and then the necessary seeding) that set up some sort of winner takes all in the championship game but BEST-LAID PLANS OF MICE AND MEN and all that….the Manchester MooniniteZ haven’t lost since Week 6 but they snapped a 2 week tie-streak with this one, they’ll head to Astoria to take on THE ONLY ACTIVE OWNER TO HAVE BEATEN THEM in 2017. The Point Loma X-Rayz will seek to halt a two week losing streak in a rather important battle with the new guy they brought into this very league. Exciting.

Next Week aka This Week: MooniniteZ v. Isotopes (#1 v. #6), X-Rayz v. BDSliderz (#4 v. #5 or #5 v. #4 but WHATEVER this matchup should sort this out)

ON TO WEEK 15. PLAYOFF POSITIONING IS GETTING TIGHTTTTTTTT (FOR EVERYONE THAT ISN’T ME….AND LIKE, THE MORNING WOOD…..AND LIKE THE TITANS) AND WE ALSO HAVE A TRADE DEADLINE COMING UP AROUND THE BEND. SO EVERY SINGLE MOVE EACH OF YOU FUCKERS MAKES FROM THIS POINT ON CAN AND WILL BE HEAVILY SCRUTINIZED IN THE CHAT, SOMETIMES. WORK THEM PHONES FOLKS………….

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2017 TRADE DEADLINE PREVIEW: IDENTIFYING THE BUYERS/SELLERS/IN-BETWEENS FOR THE 2017 SEASON

July 17, 2017July 17, 2017 AnActualBearLeave a comment

The trade deadline will soon be upon us, ESPN is yelling at me on my team page about this fact, and I voted for it to come much sooner than this but the democratic system felt otherwise. NEVERTHELESS when it arrives we will be in a unique position in the league, as this is the first year of the shortened season format and the second year where all players will be kept into the offseason. Ergo, the deadline is going to be CLOSELY followed by the playoffs and ERGO 4-for-1 trades aren’t useless in the way that they might have been for teams in a pre-dynasty format. Certain teams no doubt have their eyes on the prize for 2017, certain teams might be all but mathematically eliminated (or actually mathematically eliminated) from contention for 2017, and certain teams might be somewhere in between. What follows is a brief preview of what are IN MY HUMBLE OPINION the Buyers, Sellers, and In-Betweens in the Backyard this season. Will also dig in a bit about possible trade targets, areas of weakness or strength, etc. etc. etc. for each. Just fucking read it or fucking don’t what do I care……..

THE BUYERS

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Manchester MooniniteZ: 9-2-3, Current #1 Seed

POSSIBLE NEEDS: QUALITY starting pitching, as in starting pitchers that can deliver quality starts. Also perhaps in the market for an impact middle infielder.

POSSIBLE TRADE CHIPS: Injured High Minors SP Alex Reyes, Low Minors OF Ronald Acuna, High Minors OF Lewis Brinson, one of their many many First Basemen types perhaps?

ANALYSIS: While not necessarily in NEED of a deal, I happen to know this owner pretty well and happen to know he subscribes to the FLAGS FLY FOREVER thinking so this is a team that could be on the lookout for a “win now” move due to their proximity to a first round bye. In years past other teams have used the deadline to bolster their roster on the way to a championship, and the MooniniteZ certainly have their sights set on one this season so it would make sense that they will keep an open mind to any deadline deals that can help in that quest. Perhaps the most interesting trade chip, with that thinking in mind, is Alex Reyes. The top prospect is out for all of 2017 as he recovers from TJ surgery, which makes him a prime candidate to be flipped to a team looking towards 2018. THE MOONINITEZ CANNOT EVEN SEE 2018 RIGHT NOW.

River City Bad Dudes: 8-5-1, Current #2 Seed or #3 Seed we would know better if this waited a week BUT IT DIDN’T

POSSIBLE NEEDS: Perhaps some pitching, perhaps they could squeeze in ONE bat upgrade or something, perhaps nothing.

POSSIBLE TRADE CHIPS: High Minors SS Franklin Barreto, Low Minors SP Yadier Alvarez, High Minors SP Frances Martes, maybe High Minors SP Sean Newcomb while he still has a smidge of value….

ANALYSIS: The Bad Dudes have never been shy about pulling the trigger on deadline deals they feel can help the playoff push, and I wouldn’t expect them to start now as they hone in on a possible 3rd straight championship game appearance. There isn’t a tremendous amount of flexibility for offensive upgrades unless they want to move on from Maikel Franco or something, but the Bad Dudes are notorious for looking to shore up any pitching holes (NOTORIOUS CHEATERS) and have already dipped their toes in those types of waters a few times in 2017. Don’t rule out further toe dipping. Gross.

Point Loma X-Rayz: 7-6-1, Current #4 Seed or # 5 Seed we would know better if this waited a week BUT IT DIDN’T

POSSIBLE NEEDS: Perhaps some power or some OBP boosts for the UTIL spots, perhaps nothing.

POSSIBLE TRADE CHIPS: Low Minors SP Sixto Sanchez, Low Minors 1B Rhys Hoskins, maybe 1B Eric Thames…..

ANALYSIS: The X-Rayz have already done a good bit of re-tooling WHICH MEANS naturally that they can be considered a good bet to do possibly more re-tooling as we approach the deadline. After shuffling around bullpen pieces a bit and moving on from Chris Davis, tough to see where they might be seeking an upgrade but it has been made clear through their transactions that they are all in on 2017 (Chris Devenski becomes mighty useless in 2018 and they shipped out hyped prospect Victor Robles and such). If Robles went then that puts all prospects on notice, if you ask this amateur trade deadline assessor person. While not necessarily in NEED of a deal, I happen to know this owner pretty well and happen to know he subscribes to the FLAGS FLY FOREVER thinking so this is a team that could be on the lookout for a “win now” move due to their proximity to a first round bye. DEJA FUCKING VU MAN.

Barnegat Banana Slugs: 8-5-1, Current #3 Seed or #2 Seed we would know better if this waited a week BUT IT DIDN’T

POSSIBLE NEEDS: Power hitting of any kind.

POSSIBLE TRADE CHIPS: Injured OF Adam Eaton, SP Jake Arrieta, OF Tommy Pham, High Minors SP RP Jarlin Garcia if they want to get in on that sweet sweet SP relievers market…..

ANALYSIS: Barnegat finds themselves in an interesting position, because on one hand the recent return of Starling Marte is almost like acquiring a player in its own rights and on the other hand StarMar would not have had 35 HRs right now had he avoided a suspension. Which is ABOUT the # the Slugs are missing in order to make them competitive in HRs, aka fantasy baseball’s most important category. If you are the X-Rayz you can survive light power by loading up on guys that can steal bases and score runs that way, if you are the Slugs you probably want a bit more power than you have mustered this year. Which makes the deadline an interesting opportunity to look around and see what sort of power bats might be available, either from teams still in it (think Mark Reynolds, Khris Davis, Todd Frazier, Nelson Cruz) or teams that are closer to out of it (think Logan Morrison, Jay Bruce, Corey Dickerson, Anthony Rendon). The Slugs have managed to put themselves into the playoffs without sluggers, but it would be prudent of them to at least consider adding one at the deadline in order to make themselves more competitive in the power hitting categories.

Rojo’s Renegade Force: 6-7-1, Current #8 Seed

POSSIBLE NEEDS: JUST LIKE ONE CLOSER, JUST COMMIT TO ONE GOOD CLOSER AND SEE HOW IT FEELS FOR A FEW DAYS.

POSSIBLE TRADE CHIPS: SP/RP David Phelps, Low Minors OF Corey Ray, Low Minors OF Victor Robles if we want to keep up that carousel.

ANALYSIS: The Force is STRONG, particularly on offense where it is outscoring every team in the Backyard and out-homering and out-RBIing and out-OBPing most teams in the Backyard. So no need to really fix what ain’t broken there. And really not much to complain about from the starting pitching, although they could perhaps use one more great starter and everyone should always be on the lookout for SP help SPs are fickle creatures. So really this comes down to whether or not you think the RRF have just been UNLUCKY, because a lot of their stats support the idea that they should have a better record, or whether or not you think it is HIGH TIME to hedge bets a bit and attempt to balance with JUST LIKE ONE CLOSER. I see a couple of losses to teams that only got one or two saves and like one hold, which to me says you didn’t need allllll these extra Holds guys and could keep folks a bit honest if you have one solid closer on a team due for Ws (Wade Davis or Corey Knebel perhaps?). Or they could stay the course, but any team this close to being either in or out of the playoffs should at least look at the roster and the strategy and see what might be improved upon. Or yanno just pick up Matt Albers or something…..

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THE SELLERS

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Q-Tip City Morning Wood: 2-11-1, Current #10 Seed

POSSIBLE NEEDS: MANY NEEDS. All the needs. This roster is looking a bit barren.

POSSIBLE TRADE CHIPS: Logan Morrison, Corey Dickerson, Jay Bruce. Zack Greinke? Anyone that a “win this year” team might fancy, assuming that team is willing to deal a surplus of players or prospects to acquire said player…..

ANALYSIS: Oh, Q-Tip City. The rush of the trade may have gotten to this franchise a bit, which is why it is a bit ironic that I will now deem them “sellers,” BUT you can sell in a smart way. Many Morning Wooders have previously been seemingly GIVEN AWAY and those former deals have hurt the current roster, as reflected in the record of the current roster. However this does not mean future deals should be avoided, simply this means that future deals should be approached in a more thoughtful manner. This team is very clearly already onto 2018 and beyond, and it never hurts at that point in a season to at least explore the possibility of making deals with one of the 6 projected playoff teams. WISE DEALS, DO NOT JUST GIVE AWAY YOUR BEST PLAYERS.

Toms River Titans: 4-9-1, Current #9 Seed

POSSIBLE NEEDS: I dunno something on offense maybe, something in the bullpen maybe….. starting pitching still seems fine.

POSSIBLE TRADE CHIPS: OF Ryan Braun, OF Matt Kemp, 3B Anthony Rendon, whichever one of their Ace SPs they are willing to deal…..

ANALYSIS: The Titans may have gone a bit tooooo far in one direction, not unlike Trevor Story going too far with the Fly Ball Revolution thing and turning himself into a less powerful Ryan Schimpf. But yea, the Titans have rounded up alllll the pitching and are as tough to beat as expected in those categories but the Springer for Darvish deal might have finally pushed this team too far towards one-dimensionality (kewl word bro). FORTUNATELY if the Titans are looking to head back in the other direction they have no shortage of aces to dangle in the market. They also find themselves in position to move on from a few aging stars and/or guys just playing over their heads, if any in-the-race teams are looking for those types from the out-of-the-race teams. Because SADLY the TRTs currently find themselves all but out of the race for the second year in a row. Certainly not desperate to make a deal, there’s no rule against having too many aces or anything, but the Titans would be wise to keep their ears and mind open should VULTURES come circling.

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THE IN-BETWEENS

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OceanGate Trout Fishing Club: 4-5-5, Current #7 Seed

POSSIBLE NEEDS: Perhaps an upgrade for a replacement for whichever player is currently still injured here. Perhaps a good SP or 2.

POSSIBLE TRADE CHIPS: Low Minors 3B Nick Senzel, Low Minors SS Amed Rosario, Low Minors OF Eloy Jimenez, THERE IS PLENTY OF MINORS GUYS HERE. Also maybe 3B Todd Frazier, 3B Justin Turner, OF Gregory Polanco…..

ANALYSIS: OceanGate is currently doing everything both in their power and outside of their power to fuck up their title defense and fail to even make the playoffs. I mean LOOK AT THAT RECORD. So part of me says they should be Buyers while part of me says “meh” maybe the return of Trout can right the ship all on its lonesome. Trout, however, is probably not scheduled to pitch at all for the remainder of the 2017 season and pitching has been less than stellar in OceanGate. So it wouldn’t hurt to explore the market there and see if a good starter or 2 can’t be pried away. But then again Madison Bumgarner should be back at some point and he could certainly smooth over a lot of those ills as well. HENCE. IN-BETWEEN KINDA TEAM.

Lacey Township BackdoorSliderz: 7-6-1, Current #5 Seed or #4 Seed we would know better if this waited a week BUT IT DIDN’T

POSSIBLE NEEDS: Pitching hasn’t been great, therefore Lacey shouldn’t shy away from possibly pitching upgrades.

POSSIBLE TRADE CHIPS: LF Adam Duvall, SP Rich Hill, one of the many minor leaguers recently acquired…..

ANALYSIS: One thing that can be said about both new owners is that they both have shown no trepidation about working the trade markets and working them hard. NOT ALWAYS A GOOD THING, see: at least half the Morning Wood’s trades, but admirable nonetheless. Lacey Township is a team that was sitting reallllll pretty in playoff positioning that then happened to fall off a cliff and lose 5 straight that has now happened to win 2 outt 4. All of which has put them tantalizingly close to the playoffs, but they fall in the In-Betweens due to the fact that they have already made several trades in recent weeks as is. Those trades perhaps addressed future teams more than the current roster, so another move or two (particularly for pitching because they continue to struggle there and traded away MY BELOVED Jacob Faria) could be in play but they could also just be content to hold onto minor league pieces for possible future glory. Ain’t gonna catch me waiting around on some 17 year old prospect, no sir. But you’re probably gonna catch the BackdoorSliderz doing precisely that, and that dichotomy is what makes this league wonderful.

Astoria Isotopes: 7-6-1, Current #6 Seed

POSSIBLE NEEDS: PERHAPS STARTING PITCHING. Perhaps everyone should trade for at least one starting pitcher.

POSSIBLE TRADE CHIPS: LF Khris Davis, Low Minors SS Gleyber Torres, 1B Mark Reynolds, 1B Cody Bellinger if they’re feelin’ fuckin’ froggy…..

ANALYSIS: The Isotopes find themselves in the “In-Betweens” section for the simple fact that they have been a team INVIGORATED by the youth movement, and jumping into trade talks might ultimately threaten said movement. The ‘Topes are comfortably in the league lead in the HRs and RBIs cats and also comfortably mediocre in most pitching cats, however the return of Dallas Keuchel and a return to form for Jose Quintana might signal a turnaround there. The ‘Topes are too powerful to really want to sit this year’s playoffs out and find themselves fighting for a spot, so if they see a deal that might help them in that fight it would be wise to consider it. However there just isn’t a dire need here to make a move so any transactions could be of a non-blockbuster variety. WHO KNOWS YOU PEOPLE ARE ALL UNPREDICTABLE.

So there you have it. A bit of a preview of where IN MY HUMBLE OPINION all of your teams fall, and then an attempt to spice up the deadline by identifying possible trade chips and team needs and then just floundering and declaring everyone could use pitching. CUZ EVERYONE CAN, this is the most ERAs over 4 that this league has ever seen (probably a juiced baseball issue but still). So there. You have it. Happy Trading everybody….

TRADE REVIEW(S): WORKSHOPPING A DEADLINE FORMULA ADDITION (UPDATED)

July 10, 2017July 10, 2017 AnActualBearLeave a comment

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3 little trades happened over the weekend and I am going to use those trades as an opportunity to plan for a happier life where I have less to say about your dumb trades. Let’s see if we can’t get there, although I am sure something about the execution here won’t work out and will be further tweaked. FOR NOW OFF WE GO…..

(UPDATED: And now a 4th X-Rayz trade has emerged…..)

THE FIRST TRADE (7/8):

RRF traded Chris Devenski, Hou RP to XYZ
XYZ traded Victor Robles, Wsh CF to RRF

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NOTES/MAJOR LEAGUE COMPS WHEN APPLICABLE CUZ I STILL ENJOY THOSE:

74 Ks in 52.2 IP thus far for the 26.66 year old Devenski, a good for a 12.65 K/9…..also 6 Ws, 11 Holds, 3 Saves to boot…..also SP eligibility for the remainder of this season, which would be the largest driving force in this trade……….

23 2Bs, 6 3Bs, 7 HRs, 14 SBs, .388 OBP for Robles in A+ ball currently, all in about 250 ABs…..speed drives the whole package but the hit tool is also considered rather advanced, and he’s only 20 year olds…..Nats top prospect, finds himself in the top 5 or top 10 in all of baseball on most lists…..Should stay in CF long-term on defense alone, should be a fantasy difference maker on the SBs side even if the hit tool and/or power don’t develop as expected…..Major League Comparison: Starling Marte, for I feel he will be better than Manny Margot and Starling Marte is probably still better than Manny Margot.

ANALYSIS/THE PICKING OF THE SIDES:

The Point Loma X-Rayz respond to bullpen frustrations by going out and BOLSTERING the pen for the stretch run, all at the expense of the whole “possibly future stud prospect” thing. I like this move for both sides, however I pick the side of Rojo’s Renegade Force for the picking of the sides here because a consensus top 10 prospect is a HELLUVA return for an SP holds guy that will end up an RP-only long man type in 2018 (he is also a multi-inning type and like 3rd in line for Holds on a team that tends to blow opponents out, so the number of remaining Holds opportunities is fair to question barring injuries). But THE MOVE SHOWS MOXIE for the X-Rayz, as they settled on the SP reliever they want to help the pen in 2017 and had no qualms about parting with Robles to get their man (I parted with Robles for Keon Broxton which is probably worthy of its own debate but also KEON IS GONNA GO 20-20 THIS YEAR SHUT UP). Bottom line is I have no problem with moxie showing around here. Good move for the RRF to move on from a player that was kinda overkill with their current strategy, and good on the X-Rayz for getting their man. The picking of the sides comes down to what I think Robles could have been potentially worth in other deals and a bit of hesitation over Devenski’s usage and that is all.

THE SECOND TRADE (7/9):

XYZ traded Jason Vargas, KC SP to T
T traded Mike Clevinger, Cle RP to XYZ

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NOTES/COMPS:

This was actually just a trade for the 4th pick in the All Star Break Player Draft or whatever the fuck we are calling it, but the last 2 commissioners couldn’t do better at 3am than this ugly shit…..so just discussing Vargas here, and MUCH TO DISCUSS…..12 QS 1 CG 12 Ws, at least slighttttly supported by deeper metrics earlier in the year but eroding away a bit now (3.79 FIP overall)…..Low Ks (6.60 K/9) and a bad SIERA (4.63) at least hint the good times may not last forever, but there’s other guys that get it done with this profile so MAYBE NOT…..Manages to avoid hard contact and avoid HRs despite being a fly ball type pitcher…..34.5 years old and has never been very good, which makes the existence of a Jason Vargas shirsey kinda baffling…..even more baffling that T owns one…..

ANALYSIS/THE PICKING OF THE SIDES:

WHAT TO EVEN MAKE OF THIS ONE? On the one hand Jason Vargas is the guy being parted with here and I wouldn’t touch a sub-7 K/9 pitcher anyways and who cares. And then on the other hand what the fuck is even the value of these dumb draft picks? Realistically the X-Rayz were likely looking for some pitching staff flexibility and didn’t want to just drop Vargas, he being an All Star and all. And Isotopes ownership actually owns a Jason Vargas shirsey and there you have it. The move just makes sense. In the picking of the sides I will have to go with the Astoria Isotopes as I don’t have enough knowledge about whom is worth a damn in that draft anyways, and I can’t fault a struggling pitching staff for adding the AL ERA leader for a whole lotta nothing. They would have just used that pick on Mike Napoli.

THE THIRD TRADE (7/9):

RCBD traded Roberto Osuna, Tor RP to XYZ
XYZ traded Kelvin Herrera, KC RP to RCBD
XYZ traded Chris Davis*, Bal 1B to RCBD

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NOTES/COMPS:

12.09 K/9 for the 22.5 year old Osuna, complimented by 22 Saves and a 2.06 ERA (1.46 FIP)…..contrast that with the 27.5 year old Herrera, who has flashed dominance in the past but has now struggled in his first full year as closer (4.50 ERA [4.59 FIP], 19 Saves but only 8.74 K/9)…..both teams have struggled a bit early this season, the Royals are now above .500 while the Jays are below but tough to say which closer will see more Save ops in the 2nd half…..Osuna second only to Craig Kimbrel in swinging strike percentage (min. 30 IP) which is a thing I like to look at from time to time…..

14 HRs for the 31.25 year old Chris Davis, has been limited to 61 games due to an oblique but should return after the All Star break…..basically business as usual with all other numbers, could be poised for a big second half in order to level out the numbers (if healthy that is)…..still strikes out a whole fuck of a lot (but I roster Keon Broxton soooo…… but also KEON IS GONNA GO 20-20 THIS YEAR SHUT UP)…..

ANALYSIS/THE PICKING OF THE SIDES:

Gonna give the Point Loma X-Rayz the rare HAT TRICK OF DISAPPROVAL here and once again side with their trade partners, in this instance that is the River City Bad Dudes. And I really don’t dislike any of the X-Rayz moves here, they made their own decision on what they were comfortable giving up to acquire each of the players they acquired and that is their right as citizens of the Backyard. However I have to side with someone here and it would appear that each trade partner acquired better value relative to what they gave up, in this case due to Chris Davis being better than whatever gap in reliever talent there is currently in existence between Roberto Osuna and Kelvin Herrera. And Osuna is certainly the better and younger player here but RELIEVERS ARE FICKLE once you get beyond the top talents, if the stat lines for these two reverse the rest of this season or in 2018 I don’t think anybody REASONABLE would be able to declare that toooooo surprising. Basically the X-Rayz acquired Mark Trumbo and chose his OF eligibility over Crush and that is just fine. We will see if the Bad Dudes get to benefit from that numbers crunch but we will also hope Herrera’s volatile and blows up his own ERA a bunch of times and annoys the Bad Dudes with said blowups. Because fuck them.

THE FOURTH TRADE (7/10):

XYZ traded Zack Godley, Ari RP to MOON
MOON traded Trey Mancini, Bal DH to XYZ

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NOTES/COMPS:

THIS WAS COLLUSION

ANALYSIS/THE PICKING OF THE SIDES:

IN COLLUSION WE ALL LOSE

SO THERE WAS AN ATTEMPT AT A THING. Still felt like a lot of words but I at least feel I can reallllllly trim those notes and analysis sections down if need be, like for example if there’s 80 deals in a 2 day span or something, so we will see how things go from here. I hope I don’t get fired for workshopping on the fly BUT OH WAIT this shit is pro bono publico, even my actual job doesn’t seem keen on firing me over it…. ENJOY THE TIME AWAY FROM FANTASY FOR A FEW DAYS PEOPLE, re-connect with loved ones…..

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First Annual ESPN Player Rater Backyard All Star Teams

July 7, 2017 Michael OdomLeave a comment

Welcome to the unveiling of the first ever American and National Division All Stars, based off of ESPN’s Player Rater scoring system. The scoring system is based off of our scoring format, and I went right off of that. I simply selected the highest score for each division by position, so file any complaints with those clowns in Bristol. If someone does complain to Bristol, be sure to mention they value complete games too much. CUZ THEY SO DO. Also, 3 players had scores that would have made them All Stars, but they did not make the squad. Mike Trout and Trea Turner are DL’d and THUS forfeit their spots, and poor Josh Reddick isn’t even OWNED as of press time. So he naturally was snubbed. Stats as of 7/5. Without further adieu, your Backyard All Stars.

The Backyard All Stars

American

C: JT Realmuto, MIA, TRT

36 R, 14 2B, 3 3B, 7 HR, 32 RBI, 4 SB, .353 OBP, 5.48 PR

FOR THOSE OF YOU KEEPING SCORE, JBJ has a 5.68. Higher than JT, but the 47th ranked OF. Excellent all around first half for the man that keeps it real, especially those potent 3 triples from the slow footed position.

1B: Paul Goldschmidt, ARI, RRF

72 R, 20 2B, 2 3B, 19 HR, 66 RBI, 13 SB, .433 OBP, 16.85 PR

Goldy is indeed worth his weight in gold when you look at his numbers. Utter dominance across the board, and another 30 HR/20 SB/+.400 OBP is very much in sight. One of many ESPN PR All Star appearances to come for this man.

2B: Daniel Murphy, WAS, XYZ

55 R, 26 2B, 2 3B, 14 HR, 60 RBI, 1 SB, .395 OBP, 11.19 PR

Ohhh it just keeps getting better with this guy. Seemingly improving on career highs annually, Murphy has been a steady source of pop and production for the X-Rayz and Nats. The doubles really stick out in our format.

SS: Elvis Andrus, TEX, XYZ

51 R, 20 2B, 2 3B, 11 HR, 50 RBI, 20 SB, .347 OBP, 11.68 PR

And to think this guy was just SITTING there when I finally got on the clock in the 8th round of the 2016 draft. Maybe 9th, WHO EVEN KNOWS. But I digress, as Elvis has exceeded even my wildest dreams. The double digit homers before the break is very sexy from a shortstop that has also already reached 20 steals.

3B: Jose Ramirez, CLE, XYZ

59 R, 27 2B, 5 3B, 15 HR, 42 RBI, 9 SB, .379 OBP, 14.62 PR

Fun fact: Jose technically is the best 2B, 3B, and LF eligible in not only the American Division but allllll of The Backyard. I settled on his current 2017 position and plugged him in here at 3rd. This stat stuffing son of a gun has been the spark-plug for another X-Rayz June run of dominance, and is becoming one of the best players in our coveted fantasy format.

LF: Eric Thames, MIL, XYZ

55 R, 14 2B, 1 3B, 23 HR, 43 RBI, 2 SB, .375 OBP, 8.45 PR

And to think, this guy was just SITTING there when I finally got on the clock with the 20th pick in the 2017 Player Selection Process. While he has fallen off hard from his early season explosion, it’s pretty obvious Thames has returned to America a much different player. He was the pace car in April for ding dongs and has shown streaky pop.

CF: Charlie Blackmon, COL, T

67 R, 17 2B, 10 3B, 18 HR, 59 RBI, 6 SB, .365 OBP, 18.35 PR

Your top rated hitter folks. 10 triples will do that for ya in The Backyard, and the other 6 categories ain’t too shabby eitha. Nevermind the massive fall off in steals, Chuck Nazty is an bonafide slugger mashing away in Coors with no reason to slow down anytime soon.

RF: Aaron Judge, NYY, T

74 R, 13 2B, 3 3B, 29 HR, 65 RBI, 6 SB, .449 OBP, 17.25 PR

And your top rated rookie (second rated hitter overall) folks. The Topes lineup has been downright lethal this season, as the judge has dropped the gavel on many a victim in 2017. The face of Astoria for years to come.

2B/SS: Dee Gordon, MIA, XYZ

47 R, 13 2B, 4 3B, 18 RBI, 29 SB, .335 OBP, 10.17 PR

Meet your only ESPNPR All Star without a long ball. Ideally he never hits another one again after that Jose one. Moving on, hey speed kills still apparently. Dee’s 4 triples and 29 steals are enough to move the needle most weeks, and the OBP and runs are nothing to cough at either. Who neeeeeeeds PEDs?

1B/3B: Jake Lamb, ARI, BBS

52 R, 18 2B, 3 3B, 18 HR, 65 RBI, 4 SB, .376 OBP, 11.69 PR

A Silver Slug turned into a Golden Goose, Lamb (too many creatures to keep up here) has hit his stride in 2017. RBIs have flowed from this man, as well as the XBHs. He should be considered locked into the Dbacks and Slugs lineup for the foreseeable future.

OF: George Springer, HOU, RRF

70 R, 19 2B, 25 HR, 55 RBI, 2 SB, .374 OBP, 10.32 PR

After making his money as a Titan, Springer became a Renegade in season and the Force is now reaping the benefits. A superb slugger from the right field spot, he is one of many valuable Astros in The Backyard and is a steadying bat in the lineup for Rojo.

UTIL: Billy Hamilton, CIN, XYZ

51 R, 9 2B, 5 3B, 2 HR, 22 RBI, 34 SB, .295 OBP, 10.89 PR

Outside of the usual lack of homers (he hasn’t been shutout at least) and weak OBP, Billy has been a decent to spectacular producer in the other 5 categories. His lead off numbers especially (51 runs, 5 triples, 34 steals) are week altering stats.

UTIL: Carlos Correa, HOU, TRT

57 R, 17 2B, 1 3B, 17 HR, 58 RBI, .397 OBP, 9.31 PR

Correa continues to do his thing in Houston, and the arrow is still pointing up. Being in the heart of that Astros lineup is another juicy feature of this young stud.

RP: Greg Holland, COL, T

43 K, 1 W, 28 SV, 1.39 ERA, 6.78 PR

Another year, another reclamation project in the bullpen for Mikey T. This one paid off tremendously, as Holland has been basically lights out in the high altitude. His strikeouts have returned as well, making Holland a very valuable 2017 asset.

RP: Chris Devenski, HOU, RRF

72 K, 3 SV, 11 HD, 6 W, 2.09, 6.08 PR

WOW. Was stunned when I saw this, and after seeing he was a Renegade since Opening Day, there is no doubt the man earned his spot. DON’T FORGET Devenski is SP eligible with those glistening numbers. Decisions in all shapes and forms combined with that sexy 12.54 K per 9 and tidy 2.09 ERA make this Astro a SURE FIRE All Star in our format.

SP: Max Scherzer, WAS, BBS

163 K, 15 QS, 10 W, 2 CG, 1.94 ERA, 18.48 PR

Yeah Max is the man. Hard to stop, hard to top, Max has elite K levels, can go 9 any time he takes the mound, and plays in a weak division behind a strong lineup. What is there not to love?THE FACT THAT THE WEIRDO HAS 2 DIFFERENT COLORED EYES…the eyes are the window to the soul. Rememba that people.

SP: Chris Sale, BOS, TRT

166 K, 15 QS, 11 W, 1 CG, 2.61 ERA, 15.05 PR

Downright filth from Sale thus far in Boston. That K total is enough to slant any week in the Titans favor, and is usually overkill with their stellar rotation. Will his elbow ever explode?

SP: Corey Kluber, CLE, RRF

115 K, 10 QS, 7 W, 2 CG, 2.85 ERA, 12.98 PR

The KluBot continues to dominate batters, and rounds out a sensational set of aces in the American Division. 2 CGs offset the middling 7 win total, and don’t forget the filthy Ks he has racked up.

SP: Clayton Kershaw, LAD, TRT

146 K, 15 QS, 13 W, 2.19 ERA, 12.88 PR

No CGs yet from Kershaw in 2017, but everything else is falling right in line. Insane K rate to go with plenty of wins and a razor thin ERA. Same ole Clayton.

SP: Ivan Nova, PIT, BBS

65 K, 12 QS, 8 W, 2 CG, 3.24 ERA, 12.10 PR

Former Pinstripe Pharmhand turned Bucco Ball Buster Ivan Nova has enjoyed quite the career in Pittsburgh. The Slugs have owned him since 4/17, and for good reason. He’s been quality for most of the time and has mixed in 2 ever so clutch CGs, and that’s apparently enough to get him on this list.

P: Brandon Kintzler, MIN, T

24 K, 2 W, 22 SV, 2.41 ERA, 4.75 PR

ONLY FITTING the league’s biggest Twins fan owns the Twins closer. In a weak-ish American Division bullpen, Kintzler makes his way onto the squad not for his putrid K rate, but for his excellent work in the other closer categories. Also because the Player Rater rated him as the 3rd best reliever in the American Division so THERE.

P: Jason Vargas, KC, XYZ

78 K, 12 QS, 12 W, 1 CG, 2.62 ERA, 11.81 PR

WELP. Jason Vargas has indeed maintained his early season success. Outside of a slacking strikeout total, his other numbers are ace level. The lovely synchronization involved with his 12 wins and 12 quality starts is fascinating, and we are all happy for this TJ renaissance story.

National All Stars

C: Buster Posey, SF, JF16

35 R, 17 2B, 10 HR, 35 RBI, 1 SB, .413 OBP, 5.25 PR

Another year, another quality season for Buster. Despite the Giants falling off a cliff in 2017, Posey has maintained his usual top Catcher pace thus far.

1B: Joey Votto, CIN, MOONZ

63 R, 19 2B, 1 3B, 24 HR, 61 RBI, 3 SB, .426, 13.27 PR

The Big Red Machine in Cincy is pretty big and red and machine-like so far in 2017, and the machine-like Votto is the catalyst. Another all around spectacular performance from The Walking Red.

2B: Jose Altuve, HOU, LTBS

57 R, 25 2B, 2 3B, 12 HR, 45 RBI, 17 SB, .405 OBP, 14.20 PR

New ownership in Lacey wisely identified Altuve as the face of the franchise, and Altuve continued on his torrid tear through major league pitching. A 5 tool stud with 7 category contributions, this should be one of many ESPNPR All Star selections for Lacey’s finest.

SS: Xander Bogaerts, BOS, RCBD

50 R, 20 2B, 4 3B, 6 HR, 41 RBI, 9 SB, .361 OBP, 9.97 PR

X Gon Give It To Ya, and he has been in fact doing that for much of the 2017 season. Despite the low HR total, his impressive 41 RBIs rounds out a very productive 6 category season thus far.

3B: Nolan Arenado, COL, MOONZ

52 R, 27 2B, 5 3B, 15 HR, 63 RBI, 2 SB, .349 OBP, 12.71 PR

Nolan being Nolan out there in Manchester. That XBH dinner spread has been feeding many a Moonz win so far in 2017, and there’s noooo reason to see this trend stopping any decade soon.

LF: Corey Dickerson, TB, WOOD

60 R, 22 2B, 3 3B, 17 HR, 41 RBI, 2 SB, .363 OBP, 10.29 PR

The official face of the rebuilding Morning Wood (his nickname is C-Dick for the love of christ), Dickerson has shown he wasn’t simply a Coors Baby and is flourishing in his second year under the Trop Big Top. The power and OBP are both back to quality levels.

CF: Andrew McCutchen, PIT, MOONZ

50 R, 16 2B, 2 3B, 16 HR, 49 RBI, 6 SB, .369 OBP, 9.34 PR

While he has clearly begin to erode already from his peak (and dreadheaded might I add) years, McCutch aka McMoonz has done his fair share in 2017. MVP he is not, but ESPN PR All Star he indeed is. LOOK AT THAT 7 CATEGORY DIVERSITY.

RF: Bryce Harper, WAS, RCBD

66 R, 20 2B, 20 HR, 64 RBI, 2 SB, .431 OBP, 11.99 PR

More Bryce being Bryce for the Bad Dudes in 2017. 40 XBHs to go along with that pristine .431 on base percentage is just another day at the office for the best Show hair in the majors.

1B/3B: Travis Shaw, MIL, LTBS

46 R, 21 2B, 1 3B, 18 HR, 61 RBI, 7 SB, .362 OBP, 9.85 PR

After a sensational first third of the season last year, Shaw came crashing down to earth in a bloody heap for Boston. He’s hit his stride as a member of the Brew Crew, and Dochney wisely scooped the man up during his first week of ownership. A very productive and diverse first half for the corner infielder.

2B/SS: Corey Seager, LAD, JF16

57 R, 22 2B, 13 HR, 42 RBI, 3 SB, .397 OBP, 8.27 PR

The younger Seager has been the most reliable member of the Fishing Club infield thus far in 2017. Plenty of XBHs and runs from this budding superstar, who is grabbing one of what should be many appearances on this list in years to come.

OF: Mookie Betts, BOS, JF16

58 R, 28 2B, 15 HR, 51 RBI, 15 SB, .357 OBP, 11.50 PR

Mookie has PLUMMETED down the rankings this year, winning the crown in 2016 only to fall to 20th in 2017. Having said that, Mookie is still an all around superb Backyard player that should dominate for years to come.

UTIL: Anthony Rizzo, CHI, JF16

51 R, 16 2B, 1 3B, 19 HR, 54 RBI, 5 SB, .394 OBP, 10.16 PR

Nice little utility slot for Rizzo this season, who continues to slug while in Chicago. The steals are always an added caveat for a 1B that has 40 home run power.

UTIL: Kris Bryant, CHI, JF16

53 R, 17 2B, 2 3B, 16 HR, 33 RBI, 6 SB, .394 OBP, 9.69 PR

After last year’s MVP season, 2017 has been considered a disappointment for the ALL STAR-less Bryant. LOOK AT THAT RBI TOTAL. With that in mind, his 3B/LF eligibility and all around talent still makes him one of the better players in the National Division. APPARENTLY.

RP: Kenley Jansen, LAD, MOONZ

4 W, 20 SV, 1 HD, 56 K, 1.01 ERA, 6.86 PR

YES Kenley managed to snake a hold in this magical season of his. I do believe they trotted him out in a tight spot in the 8th and ran his pitch count up. But enough about that, LOOK AT THAT 56:2 ratio. Which reached an eye popping and lovely 50:0 at one point.

RP: Corey Knebel, MIL, LTBS

71 K, 13 SV, 11 HD, 1.11 ERA, 6.60 PR

FILTHY. Downright filthy. Knebel was an effective setup guy early in the season for Milwaukee (and nobody in The Backyard). Knebel was then scooped up in the infamous 4/20 Columbine Shooting OH I mean player add/drop in Lacey, that netted 2 ESPNPR All Stars. As a BDSlide, Knebel has 13 saves and 7 holds to go with 61 Ks in 33.1 IP.

SP: Ervin Santana, MIN, WOOD

91 K, 12 QS, 10 W, 4 CG, 2.99 ERA, 19.97 PR

The ESPN Player Rater LOVES triples and complete games. Which is why Ervin surpassed Max Scherzer on 7/5 to lead the league in PR score following his CG L. While his ERA slowly continues to rise, there is no denying his value in The Backyard scoring format. Too bad he’s playing for a 2-10-1 team.

SP: Marcus Stroman, TOR, RCBD

87 K, 11 QS, 8 W, 2 CG, 3.42 ERA, 12.29 PR

Who saw this coming?Likely Lobman, who has been high on Stroman for quite some time. While a touch below his usual K rate, the ERA is down and he entered the season with 1 career CG, only to see him drop 2 thus far in 2017.

SP: Zack Grienke, ARI, WOOD

124 K, 9 QS, 10 W, 1 CG, 3.05 ERA, 11.16 PR

The Dbacks get a nice return on their investment (I guess?), seeing Grienke return back to a K thrower with a near sub-3 ERA. His arrow is as hard to project as any other player in baseball at this point, but there is no denying his 2017 filth so far.

SP: Carlos Martinez, STL, WOOD

124 K, 12 QS, 6 W, 1 CG, 3.15 ERA, 10.39 PR

The crown jewel of a once ace laden rotation in Q-Tip City, C-Mart has filthy stuff (evidenced by his 124 Ks in 111.1 IP). But a limited 2017 Cardinals squad and his own inconsistencies have hurt his win total.

SP: Jacob deGrom, NYM, LTBS

125 K, 11 QS, 8 W, 1 CG, 3.55 ERA, 10.30 PR

The official hair of the Lackey Backdoorz, deGrom is back to dominance after a brief hiccup. The ERA is up a bit from his previous years, but the Ks have spiked as well. With his Mets tie-in, Jake has to be one of the more coveted players by Lacey ownership.

P: Andrew Miller, CLE, JF16

65 K, 3 W, 2 SV, 17 HD, 1.49 ERA, 6.03 PR

JF16 paid a pretty penny for this hybrid bullpen arm, and while one can wonder if there were cheaper guys available, no one can deny the man’s dominance. The elite K total and ERA means the mix and match style of his usage isn’ttttt really an issue.

P: Alex Wood, LAD, MOONZ

97 K, 7 QS, 10 W, 1 HD, 1.67 ERA, 8.22 PR

Another season, another tantalizing performance by Alex Wood. HOWEVER, this one hasn’t been decimated by injuries yet. And look at those numbas, that ERA is downright sexy. Not to mention that 10.82 K per 9, the Moonz calling card.

TRADE REVIEW: IN WHICH I BOTH YELL AT Q-TIP CITY AND THEN GIVE THEM THE TEENSIEST TINIEST BIT OF CREDIT

July 6, 2017July 6, 2017 AnActualBearLeave a comment

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I still kinda hate these segments and question the need for most of these trades to be discussed in even this small amount of detail AND YET at the same time Q-Tip City keeps making bizarre trades, so I keep feeling like I need to type something out just to remind them to stop making bizarre trades. So I guess I will do that oneeeee more time. Hopefully. And then I am going to start brainstorming how to handle the potential flurry of trades to come in a better format than this current format……PLEASE HOLD ALL TRADES UNTIL THEN UNLESS THEY HAVE MY EXPRESSED CONSENT OR ARE DEALS WITH ME.

THE FIRST TRADE (7/5):

WOOD traded Brian Dozier, Min 2B to LTBS
WOOD traded Michael Kopech, CWS SP to LTBS
LTBS traded Mark Trumbo, Bal RF to WOOD
LTBS traded Jacob Faria, TB SP to WOOD
LTBS traded Jeff Hoffman, Col SP to WOOD

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THE MORNING WOOD RETURN:

RF Mark Trumbo – LET’s………just talk about this fuckin’ guy when he reaches his final destination below.

High Minors SP Jacob Faria – 23.9 year righty starter for the Rays, their 9th ranked prospect according to Baseball America (and unranked overall by all of these FOOLS). Has thrown 32 innings in the bigs thus far and they have been BEAUTS: 3-0, 2.23 ERA (2.84 FIP), 35 Ks in 32.1 IP (9.74 K/9), 5 QS to open the big league career. Was striking out 12.89 per 9 with a 3.07 ERA prior to the call up. CLEARLY he’s not like some 20 year old top prospect but has some LEGIT movement on his pitches and his velo has ticked up a bit over the past year, I think he’s far better than projected. Could eventually settle in as a nice #3, could play just fineeee in fantasy particularly if he keeps the Ks up and the walks down (1.39 BB/9, down from 3.38 in AAA). I LIKE HIM A WHOLE LOT. Major League Comparison: Zack Greinke BOOOOOM went there

SP Jeff Hoffman – 24.45 year old righty and former top Jays prospect SHIPPED over to Colorado in the Tulo deal, and now having to deal with the whole pitching in Colorado thing. 5-1, 4.01 ERA (3.44 FIP), 48 Ks in 49.1 IP (8.76 K/9), 5 QS at press time here in 2017. Pitching farrrrr better than he did in 2016, but still he is a Rockies pitcher and one that currently gets more fly balls than grounders so yanno. BUYER BEWARE and all, if the Morning Wood care about that sorts of thing.

THE BACKDOORSLIDERZ RETURN:

2B Brian Dozier – 30 year old 2B for the Twins and the man that went fucking NUTS last summer. .333 OBP, 17 2Bs, 13 HRs, 37 Rs, 39 RBIs, 10 SBs in 315 ABs thus far this season. Had 14 HRs in the first half last season then went on to double that in the 2nd half, WHICH would be a mighty helpful push for a playoff team or playoff hopeful. Not at all saying that is going to happen though, but what I ammmm saying is any talk that Dozier is washed up or whatever is kinda silly. He won’t have his 2016 but he’s well on pace for sayyyy his 2014, which was a 20-20 season, and 10+-10+ guys aren’t just growing on trees at this point in the year. Top 5ish top 8ish second basemen.

Low Minors SP Michael Kopech – 21.15 year righty flamethrower for the White Sox, their 5th ranked prospect according to Baseball America (#24 overall BA May update, #11 MLB.com, #25 Baseball Prospectus Midseason top 50 RELEASED TODAY). I wrote about Kopech back when he was traded all the way back in likeeeee February, let’s see what I wrote about him then and then see where he is at now shall we:

“Michael Kopech. Kopech is fairly well-known for folk tales about a 105 mph fastball, but regardless of the veracity of that claim it can be verified that he absolutely dominated High A last year. Dominated to the tune of a 40% K rate (14.19 K/9) and a 2.25 ERA. There are the usual concerns of youthful pitching here, as pitching prospects are always a risk and Kopech did have a 14% walk rate (5.02 BB/9) to go along with the Ks. But the upside is immense here, hence why he was included in the Chris Sale trade, and it isn’t difficult to imagine Kopech dominating in fantasy as soon as 2018. A good piece for a Backyard expansion team that might struggle to contend in its first year, and a great trade chip in the event the MWs find themselves in need of a playoff push in 2017.”

OH TO BE YOUNG AND NAIVE AND CONTEMPLATING QTC PLAYOFF RUNS. That playoff pipe dream is now dead, but Kopech is still alive, and he’s been MEH in his first taste of AA: 4-6, 4.02 ERA (3.58 FIP), 101 Ks in 78.1 IP (11.60 K/9). Still throws gas, still walks way too many people (6.09 BB/9). I am sure the White Sox still see him as a starter but IIIIIII, I still see him as a nasty closer. Possibly because it’s easier to predict pitching prospects to fail and end up in the bullpen, possibly because he allegedly has a “violent” delivery and the only guy that can survive that as a starting pitcher seems to be Chris Sale FOR NOW. So maybe Kopech ends up a hard-throwing closer albeit one that maybe breaks into the Backyard with SP eligibility, which would be a nice little boon for whatever team possesses him at that time. Major League Comparison: Trevor Rosenthal.

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RETURN SEAN LIKES MORE:

THE TEAM TRADING WITH THE MORNING WOOD BUT OF COURSE! This is yet another instance, that I think can be blamed for a lot of trades, where there just doesn’t seem to be great valuation of the players being traded and NO ATTEMPTS to test the market to see if they can do better than what they are being offered. Perhaps that is the QTC’s problem. Perhaps they are just TOO POLITE and therefore once they engage in trade dialogue with a team they feel a responsibility to get a deal done. IN ANY CASE Dozier was sold below what he was likely worth, I see no reason to throw in Kopech for that return, another suspect trade but at least they are running out of trade pieces? At least that.

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THE SECOND TRADE (7/5):

XYZ traded Willy Adames, TB SS to WOOD
WOOD traded Mark Trumbo, Bal RF to XYZ

AND ALSO SOME DUMB DRAFT PICKS. I couldn’t care less about those draft picks so I won’t even look ’em up.

THE X-RAYZ RETURN:

RF Mark Trumbo – 31.5 year old RF for the Orioles, fresh off his best season ever and even then people didn’t really want to give him a job afterwards. .318 OBP, 15 2Bs, 12 HRs, 50 Rs, 40 RBIs, 1 SB in 329 ABs thus far this season. Hit 42 bombs last season but has notttt really carried over into this season, ISO is lowest it’s ever been and hard contact is way down from last year’s levels. Because I care about the X-Rayz I even went as far as to check the statcast exit velocity shit, and that doesn’t seem toooooo bad so perhaps he can regain the power stroke. Last year had 29 dongs and a .288 average at the break, then hit 19 with a .214 average after. Needs to do a REVERSAL of that kinda year to truly justify the prospect parted with here, IMHO, but also if the X-Rayz win the title all trades are considered good trades for said championship season. Everybody knows that. SO JUST WIN.

THE MORNING WOOD RETURN:

Low Minors SS Willy Adames – 21.8 year old SS prospect for the Rays, their top overall prospect in fact (#7 overall BA May update, #16 MLB.com, #26 Baseball Prospectus Midseason top 50 RELEASED TODAY). In AAA for the first time this season and HOLDING HIS OWN: .371 OBP, 17 2Bs, 5 3Bs, 6 HRs, 45 Rs, 36 RBIs, 6 SBs in 296 ABs. The only hope for the David Price trade to not be a complete disaster and fortunately there’s a pretty good chance he’s up soon for the Rays (SS situation is a mess) and a pretty good chance he is pretty good. Projects as a future above-average hitter with above-average power and keeps getting called “barrel-chested” whenever I read about him so who knows if he stays at SS. But he shall be good. I think. I feel pretty okay about this one. Major League Comparison: Addison Russel, BECAUSE ALL SS PROSPECTS ARE LUMPED TOGETHER THESE DAYS.

RETURN SEAN LIKES MORE:

MORNING WOOD IN A SHOCKER! I can’t remember the last time I sided with them but they actually did the RESPONSIBLE rebuilding team thing here and traded an overrated slugger for a potential stud, and even a potential stud that is fairly close to the Show. So props on not grabbing a 17 year old or whatever. Trumbo is not a true 40 HR hitter even in this JUICED BALL era and that’s what I think he would need to be to justify the prospect parted with, I feel there’s probably better or comparable options out there currently in the FA pool, you can give hometown boy Hunter Renfroe a chance for free for pete’s sake. That being said I like the win now moxie outta Point Loma right now.

And……STILL. I AM NOT GIVING THE MORNING WOOD AN A+ HERE OR ANYTHING, STILL WAS JUST CONFUSING TRADES ALL AROUND. Surely you didn’t need to acquire fucking Mark Trumbo as the one piece you needed to then flip for Adames, so don’t try and sell me on that one. And tossing in Kopech just as a sweetener in order to ensure you got that sweet sweet Jeff Hoffman return in the Dozier deal is just tough to look at. Just tough…….to look at. All the way around. RUN OUT OF TRADE PIECES ALREADY, I dread a potential Greinke or C-Mart giveaway. Is what I dread. Gonna once again implore you to be better than this going forward, Bonerz.